The Way We Were
by LoveforPenandDerek
Summary: Short story series about Reid's love life. New story- Emily tells Reid she is leaving the BAU but she is not leaving him behind forever.
1. Compartments, Reid and Emily

**Note**- This will be an anthology of stories about Spencer Reid's love life.

Whenever I write a one shot, drabble or short story about his character I will put it here. The stories stand alone. They are in no way connected or a continuing story.

**Reid and Emily **

**Compartments**

**September 2013**

Contrary to what he probably thinks, Emily Prentiss did not give up her job at the BAU because of anything any man did or did not do. She moved on because it was time to move on. She let them go so she could have something else she wanted more: a child.

Of course everyone swore they would keep in touch and, for a while, a few of them did but working that job takes just about everything from a person and so she understood when the phone calls and get togethers started to grow further and further between.

They were still friends. Still family. But, of course, it wasn't the same as when she worked with them. Nothing can stay the same forever.

She has no regrets. Her adoptive daughter keeps her busy at night and every weekend and her desk job in the FBI keeps her busy all day during the week. She has a full life.

Does she miss them?

Of course but she's grown used to it. A person can grow used to almost anything. She knows this and reminds herself of it often, usually when she is in bed with her lover who she keeps away from her daughter because she doesn't want to let him that close. Let him all the way into her life. She is only with him because she really can't stand having bad first dates or short, unsatisfying flings anymore. She doesn't want to bring a parade of strange guys through her daughter's life or take time away from her kid to search for a lover.

So she stayed with Marcus longer than she probably would have back when she worked at the BAU. But he gives her some of what she wants and a little of what she needs. Its good enough for now. She doesn't want to devote the energy it would take to have more than that with some other man...to go out looking for it.

That all made sense in her very analytical mind- keeping her lover compartmentalized from her daughter and her job and her family and her past- until the day she bumped into Spencer Reid in a coffee shop on her side of town....she had moved to this neighborhood to avoid moments like this and for three years she did....and then she was stuck in a moment she didn't think she wanted to have, alone with him for the first time since that one time that went so wrong, and she doesn't have a clue what to say.

She was heading for the door, her eyes on her blackberry and a coffee in her hand, when she ran right into him.

"Oh! Sorry about that," she muttered apologetically before her eyes fluttered up. "Reid....uh."

"Emily."

"Hi!" She felt foolish for her bubbly greeting. He always did reduce her to a school girl when she was calm, cool and in control with every other man she ever met. "What are you doing over here?"

"A new bookstore opened down the street and I wanted to check it out."

"Oh. Sure. I heard about that place opening last month. I thought about you when I read the article...." Gulp, that was great, she chided herself. There she was letting him know she thought about him still. "Uh...thinking how you probably read every book they have in there already!" She let out a strange laugh that she knew sounded strained.

"Actually no because new books are released each week. During an average year there are 300,000 titles released by traditional publishers and just slightly less by non-traditional. Even reading as many words a minute as I do I couldn't make it through all of them. Of course, if I had more free time and eye strain was not a concern, I probably could read every book published in English."

She shook her head at him and smiled slightly. "Maybe when you retire."

"My eye sight will most probably be quite diminished by that time as age usually-"

"I was just joking."

He stared at her. She smiled brighter.

It was really unfair. She missed him. Missed moments like this.

(_I think that possibly maybe I'm falling for you._

_Yes there's a chance _

_that I've fallen quite hard over you_

_I've seen the waters _

_that make your eyes shine._

_Now I'm shining too_

_Because _

_oh because _

_I've fallen quite hard over you._

_If I didn't know you_

_I'd rather not know._

_If I couldn't have you_

_I'd rather be alone.)_

Emily let herself relax for a moment as she stood there looking into his eyes. Let herself have this one second where she could remember him in a good way.

Unlike the memory that had haunted her for the last few years.

XXXXXXXXXX

May 2010

She couldn't blame it on alcohol but she wished that she could. They were at a party for Henry's birthday. She ended up in the kitchen with Reid, just talking casually, and for some reason that night she felt so good and relaxed.

Maybe it was being around the kids, being away from work, just feeling normal for once.

And Reid was there. Over the years she had developed a thing for him, in her own head, but she never thought she'd do anything about it. She had her bad dates and her sad little flings with men who wanted her to work less and dote on them more, or ones who didn't care she was hardly around and were more than happy to be not much more than a booty call to her.

But Emily lived for the moments when she had Reid's full attention. Sometimes she even did things to get it. She didn't plot or plan or anything like that but she would just do something to make his eyes and his mind be on her, for just a minute, and when she had his full attention she felt truly alive.

Standing in JJ's kitchen she felt like that. He was listening to her talk about when she lived in Italy and this shrine she used to go to that people believed could heal them. Reid told her that was not possible- that a place could heal a person if they prayed there- and she told him that wasn't the point, if it worked or not. The point was it made people feel better.

He just gave her a look like he didn't get how something that couldn't be real could make anyone feel good and, seeing that very familiar look, she felt this rush of something warm and sweet through her...something as close to love as she had felt in years...and then she walked closer to him.

Without giving him any notice she pressed her mouth to his.

For a second she thought he might respond back but he didn't. It grew awkward and she moved away from him, running her hand through her hair and laughing in an embarrassed way. "Way to make a girl feel rejected, Reid!" she joked, trying to play it off.

"I'm sorry," he told her in a serious tone. "I'm just not sure what brought that on."

"It was just an impulse gone wrong," she said, shrugging her shoulders before she walked out.

He didn't bring it up again. By summer Emily was in a lawyer's office filing out paperwork to be a parent and soon after she left behind her desk in the bull pen, and her chance to see Reid every day.

XXXXXXXXXX

September 2013

Emily's phone buzzed. Looking down at it, in her hand, she then told Reid "I need to get into the office."

"Could I walk you out?"

She was taken aback by that, for a second, and stilled but then said "Sure. I'm parked down the block. I have a mini van now. Funny, huh?"

"That is the most popular vehicle for parents."

"Right," she said, in a tone that told him he didn't have to constantly prove to the world he knew everything.

As they walked down the block he asked her "How is Cassandra enjoying St. Johns?"

That was the prestigious pre-school Emily's daughter attended. Emily's mother got her in there. Emily had almost refused to send Cassie there but then she thought about how she didn't want to deny Cassie a chance at the kind of future being in the right schools gave a person. In a way Emily almost wished she could forget about all that and just raise her kid in a stress-free, fun matters more than anything, kind of way. But she feared that would be short changing Cassie somehow.

It was hard to know what was right and what was wrong when it came to parenting. And Emily had to figure it all out alone.

"I guess she likes it enough. There's a few bullies though. Can you believe it? At that age."

"Unfortunately I can."

She cringed at her stupid slip of the tongue. Of course he could understand that. She never saw him as that kid who got picked on but he still seemed to never forget that was who he used to be. "I almost didn't send her to any pre-school at all. Would that have made me a bad mom? I can afford it and she was accepted....but, you know, she's four. Why so much pressure already? Can't she just make mud pies and flash her panties at the boys in the park for right now?"

Reid's eyes widen. "She does that?"

"Sometimes!" Emily laughed. They made it to her car. She hated for their time together to end but she had to get to work. Even though she didn't go into the field anymore her position still was fast paced and highly stressful.

She didn't really look forward to going to work right then. But she knew that this time she had with him would help her get through the day. She would put Reid into a place in her head that nothing else could touch and she'd go there when she wanted to smile.

Emily might not let herself think of him often but now when she did at least she'd have a good memory to remember. And that was something.

After all, nobody gets everything. And Emily didn't think she could let herself mourn not getting Dr. Reid as her lover.

She just put it in a box in her memory and left it there. The lingering longing for more with him.

Looking at Reid, as she stood next to her minivan, she said "It was good to see-"

And then his mouth connected with hers, drowning out the last word and changing her mind about a lot of things that might be coming for her in the future. All because she randomly ran into him in her favorite coffee shop.

_(I never knew just what it was_

_about this old coffee shop I love so much._

_All of the while_

_I never knew._

_I never knew just what it was_

_about this old coffee shop I love so much._

_All of the while_

_I never knew_

_All of the while _

_all of the while_

_it was you_) (Landon Pigg)

THE END


	2. Remembering the Girl, Reid and Elle

**Remembering The Girl**

**Reid and Elle**

He stared at the picture while holding his breath. If he held his breath long enough he knew he would pass out but that wasn't enough to kick his involuntary reflexes back into gear to do what they were supposed to do without him having to think about it- keep him alive.

Shivers ghosted over his arms, making the hair stand on end, as his body leaned just a little closer to the screen. His eyes narrowed on her image.

"That's _her,_" declared Penelope Garcia as she pointed at the computer screen. Her voice was confident and dared the rest of the people huddled around her computer desk to disagree.

The team had just come back from a case where their tech Goddess had to hack into security cameras for downtown San Francisco. On one of them Penelope had been sure a face she spotted was their former co-worker Elle.

JJ squinted at the screen. "That could be anyone."

"It could be anyone but its Elle," Penelope said.

"Baby girl, its hard to really tell."

"I knew it the second I saw her. It was like I got shivers from head to toe."

Emily asked "And shivers mean it has to be true?" in her teasing way with her eyebrows raised.

"Shivers," said Penelope in a dead serious tone "are very reliable, I will have you know. Derek, back me up here."

He kissed her forehead. "It could be her, silly girl." Then he straightened "Can't say for sure though. What does it matter anyway? She walked away from the BAU and all of us without a second thought. So why are we giving her one now?"

Penelope shrugged. "I guess you're right. I just wonder, you know, what she's up to."

Soon after that everyone left Penelope's office and headed to their own desk. The mysterious maybe Elle on the video footage was pushed to the back of most of their minds while they finished up their paperwork so they could head home.

But Reid couldn't forget the image he saw on the screen. He thought most of his co-workers didn't realize just how close he had gotten to Elle before she left. Because of that he always felt a lingering sense of guilt that he hadn't saw how much trouble she was in emotionally and mentally after she was shot by The Fischer King. He knew she was struggling but he didn't know she was at the end of her rope. That she was about to throw it all away- her career, her morals, and even her freedom, if she had been arrested for murder.

And that's what it was when she killed that rapist unsub. The whole team knew it. They carried it every day. Someone should have helped Elle.

But only Reid thought of her every Christmas and every Cuban holiday, because her father was from there, and every time certain songs played on the radio and when he was stopped at a train or drinking the same booze she offered him that night they talked in her hotel room.

He didn't obsess about her. She was gone and she wasn't coming back. Still sometimes, in moments like this, he thought of her and wondered if she was happy now....wherever Elle is.

It would make him feel better, like he feels when he hears his mother's latest medication is working, to know she is happy. Elle is much like Gideon in Reid's mind now. It's the not knowing that hurts the most.

Sure he could ask Garcia to track them down. In under a minute he could have an address and know intimate details about their lives, from where they shopped to what movies they rented last weekend. But Reid would never do that.

If Elle wanted him to know she would call. But, like Gideon, she has never called and never will. At first he was angry at both of them but now he just fears for them. He just wishes he could go to sleep tonight knowing that wherever she is now, and whoever she leans on since she won't lean on him, that at least some part of her has found peace and that someone is holding her tonight.

That she's at least not haunted anymore. If he knew that....it would make all the difference. But he'll never know.

He gets back to his paperwork but his mind is only half on the words on the page. The rest of his mind is still back in Garcia's office looking at a dark haired woman that could be Elle.

(_You could be happy_

_and I won't know._

_  
But you weren't happy the day I watched you go_

_-_

_And all the things_

_that I wished I had not said  
are played in loops _

_till it's madness in my head_

_-_

_Is it too late to remind you how we were?_  
_But not our last days of silence, screaming, blur_

_-  
Most of what I remember makes me sure  
I should have stopped you from walking out the door  
_

_-_

_You could be happy, I hope you are_  
_You made me happier than I'd been by far_) (snow patrol)

XXXXXXXXXX

She had her phone on speaker as her fingers flew over the keys, Penelope said "Maybe we shouldn't care, Hot Stuff, but I do."

"I think you oughta leave it alone, sweetheart."

"Too late," she said as the information filled her screen. She read it off to Derek, telling him where Elle lived now. "See....San Francisco....am I good or am I uber awesome and amazing?"

"You are the best, woman. Now that you satisfied your curiosity about the mysterious case of the disappeared Elle Greenway can we let this rest? So she lives in San Francisco. Good for her."

"You used to care about her too."

Long silence and then a sigh. "She made her choice. I just think we oughta respect it. She obviously don't want contact with us."

Penelope sighed. "Guess you're right. But it's a shame. She could need friends, you know?"

"I'm sure she's fine, baby girl. Don't let it bother you. Just forget about Elle, okay?"

"No promises." Click.

Reid had listened to Derek's half of the conversation from his nearby desk. "Garcia tracked her down?"

Derek sat back, looking very tired, and rubbed his hand over his bald head. "Yeah."

Without any forethought, his body moving and then his mind realizing what his body was doing, Reid got up and headed to Penelope's office. Halfway there he thought of forgetting about it. Looking back he saw Derek watching him. His friend knew somewhat of the damage that Elle did to Reid. Reid hadn't let someone as close as he let her since Reid was nineteen. That time had ended painfully and he didn't want to trust again. Didn't feel like he could give his heart to anyone. Didn't feel like he even knew how to interact with women. He felt out of his league when, with everything else, he was the one who was head's above the class. But Elle hadn't looked at him like a social reject who couldn't get a woman. She told him just to ask someone else and he'd have a date, as if he was worth someone saying yes. As if there was no question in her mind.

Because, he later learned, there hadn't been. She saw him as a man, a friend, and she saw him as someone she wanted to be her lover. He wasn't sure but she was. She wasn't able to let down her walls with anyone else but him. She was the tough girl for the rest of the team but she was beautifully complex and painfully broken with Reid....laying herself bare in every way.

When she gave him all that how could he do anything but fall for her? Before he knew it a few nights in hotel rooms during their cases led to his heart being filled up with only her, to the point it ached when she went home after work and didn't call him. They only found stolen snatches of time when cases were too much to bear to be together and, before he even was used to being her lover or even said "I love you, Elle, so much I think it could kill me," she was shot and then she was gone.

Reid knocked on Garcia's door.

"Enter the Oracle of Quantico's kingdom, minion."

Reid limped inside. Why was it his leg hurt more when he was emotional?

Seeing him a wide smile went over Penelope's lips. Though Reid had never told her even one word about being with Elle, and though Morgan was supposed to keep his mouth shut, it was clear that Penelope either knew or had strong suspicions because she said "I thought you might come back."

Then she tapped a red painted nail on the computer screen. "Behold the current address of one Ms. Elle Greenway, still single and the only resident of her condo. No marriage record or divorce decrees on file so she must never have found her prince since she left."

"That was her on the security camera."

"Even in a crowd I could spot her a mile away. Am I good or am I good? I was looking for someone else but when I saw her....well, the shivers. I mentioned that already. I just knew. So, boy genius, the question is do you agree with my Sir Derek....should we just leave this alone?"

"Probably. I mean....she knows where we are if she wanted to contact us."

"Maybe she doesn't think we care anymore."

"It has been a long time."

"Not too long."

"I have to get back to my paperwork." He started to limp away.

"Sweetie......don't you want to take her phone number? Just in case."

"In case of what?"

"You change your mind about calling her. This could be the universe telling you to reach out and touch base with her."

"The universe?"

"This could be cosmic."

"That doesn't make any sense."

"Rarely do matters of the heart make sense. That's what makes life so much fun and so hard at the same time." She jotted down the phone number and address and pressed it into his hand. "Just between you and me."

That night he sat on the couch in his apartment, books scattered on the coffee table and nearby chair, and tried to not think of the piece of paper that was now tacked on a board in his home office. The number he could dial to see if she was doing okay after all these years gone by. If she had recovered. Ask her why she pushed them all away. Why she couldn't stay in touch? Why she left Reid with not so much as a letter, like Gideon gave him, or whispered words of regret, like when his father walked away. Neither gestures were much comfort but they were something.

She left him with nothing and it was still all he had. But he didn't hate her at all. He just wanted her to be doing well.

He wasn't gonna call tonight. But when he thought of her this time he pictured her face on that computer screen, how she looked deep in thought, and hoped that whatever her life was like now she was happier than she ever was when Reid was all she had to get through the dark times.

Because he knew he hadn't been enough. If he was then she would have never left him. So he won't call. She needs someone who is enough and that's not him.

(_Do the things _

_that you always wanted to_

_-_  
_Without me there to hold you back_

_Don't think, just do_

_-_

_More than anything I want to see you, girl,_  
_take a glorious bite out_

_of the whole world)_

Standing behind her in her office Derek asked Penelope, in an exhausted tone, "Garcia, why couldn't you leave well enough alone?"

Penelope had just hung up the phone with Elle. "Because everything happens for a reason."

Derek raised on eyebrow. "So....what's up? What did she say?"

"I asked her to visit us sometime when she has vacation days. It turns out she'll be in New York next month and she could take an extra day to come down here. So you see, baby," she smiled widely "that call was not wasted. And she sounded like she was relieved to hear from me. I should have done this years ago."

"I don't want her messing with our boy's mind again."

"If I'm not mistaken, handsome, its Reid's choice if he wants to risk getting hurt again. You can't protect him from heartache. Everyone who plays the game takes the chance of getting burned but they also have the chance to get everything they ever wanted."

"Baby girl, you are a romantic."

She smiled and grinned, nodding up and down. "I think this is a good thing. I could tell Reid was curious about her still. So we'll all have lunch and let destiny decide."

He shook his head at her, in a playful way, "Playing matchmaker might bite you in the ass."

"I'd love to bite you in the-"

"Hush!"

THE END


	3. More Like You, Reid and Emily

**More Like You **

**Emily and Reid**

**June 2010**

"Ugh," cried SSA Emily Prentiss as she walked into the break room on Friday morning "no one speak to me."

Her co-workers were gathered around. Penelope had her face in the paper reading a gossip column aloud to Derek, who was leaned back in his chair with his arms crossed behind his head, seeming not too interested in the news but also staring at Penelope the whole time.

At the counter, pouring an ungodly amount of sugar in his cup, was Dr. Spencer Reid: resident genius. Emily bumped her hip into him and told him "Move. I need coffee and if I don't get it someone just may get shot up in here."

Derek chuckled. "Bad night, Prentiss? What was his name?"

"Shut up," she told him, pouring the coffee in her mug. "And Alan."

Derek chuckled again. "Alan, huh? I take it that Alan," he dragged out the name in a teasing way "didn't rock your world?"

She turned to face Derek. "Alan," she slurred the name "couldn't rock my parking space let alone my world."

Reid asked "What does that even mean?"

"UGH!" Emily cried in frustration. "I don't know why I put myself through this. I really don't. You would think I'd learn my lesson."

Derek teased her "Don't stress about it. I've heard its hard for nerds to find love."

Emily said "PG, hit him for me."

Penelope pushed Derek's shoulder. "Be nice."

He flirted with her, waggling his eyebrows as he leaned close, "You would like for me to be nice to you, wouldn't you, mama?"

"You know I would but we're talking about Em now. Stop teasing her," Penelope told Derek "or else that spanking you always threaten to give me just might be felt on your handsome, chocolate ass."

Emily rolled her eyes. "What a threat. He'd like that! Thanks for nothing."

Reid focused on Emily and asked, as if it was really important and part of a case, "What exactly were Alan's faults that you found so unattractive?"

"What was attractive about him is a better question," Emily said "And a shorter answer."

"There certainly must have been something that drew you to him in the first place. A sexual attraction, perhaps?" Reid asked.

"Ewww! Don't say sexual attraction to me," Emily told him.

"I don't see why not," Reid answered "We use those words often in the course of our cases. Why shouldn't I use it now to better understand your situation?"

Derek chimed in. "She might like it too much, kid."

Emily picked up a sugar packet and flicked it at Derek's head. It smacked against him and he told her "You could have taken out an eye of The Derek Morgan."

Emily shot back. "This is what's wrong with the world, right here."

Penelope smirked. Derek chuckled. Reid asked "What? What's wrong with the world?"

"Men!" Emily cried. "Men who speak in the third person about themselves like Morgan just did. Men who think they are God's gift to women. Men who think they can date five women at the same time-"

Derek grinned and teased "How did this become about me? I thought Alan was the cause of your foul mood?"

Reid said "We still haven't established what exactly Alan did to be rejected by you."

"He was born," Emily told him. "He's an asshole. That's it, plain and simple."

Reid said "Without more information I find it rash for you to conclude that. I certainly haven't been able to draw that interference from what you've said so far. Only that you were dissatisfied with his company last night. The why is still a mystery."

"He's just a jerk. Not all guys are like you, Reid. Some are just scuzz and I meet them all. And then agree to drinks with them! You know just once, just one damn time, I would like to meet a guy like you instead."

Derek and Penelope shared a smile. Reid looked confused, constipated almost. He asked "And what is that supposed to mean, exactly? Another nerd?"

"Forget it!" She went to leave the break room. "I have paperwork to do. Remember: no one talks to me or they die."

Derek called after her "You need to take the bullets out of that gun, Prentiss! I'm too young to die. My Ma wants grandbabies," then he laughed when she flipped him off.

Reid followed Emily. As he left the break room he could hear Penelope telling Derek he had to lay off Emily today because she was having the worse run of luck with men. She really wanted to settle down finally but it wasn't looking like it wasn't going to happen.

Reid meant to ask Emily right away to further explain her comment about wanting to meet a man like him but the tense expression on her face as she worked at her desk stopped him. He waited till the end of the work day. When she went to go home he grabbed his coat and headed for the elevators too.

By this time her bad mood at passed. Standing there he said "Alan obviously wasn't compatible for you."

She made a sound that meant Duh. "Obviously. Your point?"

"Only that its curious that you think someone like I would be. In what way?"

"Let it go, Reid. I was obviously still drunk when I said that."

"What time did you have your last drink last night?"

She shook her head at him and gave him a strange look while they walked into the elevator. "You wanna know what I meant?"

"It would be helpful to me, yes."

She smiled a little at that. "Oh, yeah? Gonna take my theories and use them on the next woman you hit on."

"I don't hit on women. When I date its usually because of a complicated set of circumstances, mostly work related, that thrust me and a woman into the same orbit for a period of time. And it usually is very unfulfilling because the circumstances change and she moves on with her life."

The elevator opened into the parking garage and they walked out together. "And how is knowing what I think about you going to help any of that?" Emily asked

"It could assist me in seeking out the right kind of woman next time. Someone more compatible, as you will certainly try to do for yourself also after this Alan debacle."

"It wasn't a debacle!" she cried. "Okay, it was. Thanks for naming it. Now I will forever think of last night as The Alan Debacle." She gave him a small smile to show she was teasing.

He kept giving her with a very serious look. Like she was a science experiment. They reached Emily's car. She stuck her key in the door.

Reid prompted "You want to find a man more like me. In what way? And be precise please."

"Geez, Reid, you sure are fishing."

"Phishing? Garcia warned me about that. Isn't that where your credit card information is stolen?"

Emily rolled her eyes and smiled. "Fishing for compliments is what I meant."

"Oh." He blushed a little. "No, its not that, not really. I just am very interested to know what you meant by that off-hand comment. If you didn't truly mean it though-"

"No, I did!"

He stared at her. There seemed to be an increase in tension between them in that moment. At least Emily suddenly felt warm and like she couldn't swallow. She distracted herself by opening the door of her car and tossing her purse inside.

She turned and looked at him again, slowly raising her eyes to meet his, resisting the urge to brush his hair away from his eyes. Emily resisted that urge about two hundred times in a typical day so that was nothing new.

"Okay, Reid, its like this. You are a good man. That's rare. You're intelligent-"

He frowned at that, as if that was the last thing he wanted to hear.

She quickly added "And very sexy! You're what women want to have for themselves and Alan is what makes women wanna go gay. Its simple. I want someone more you like and less him like. Whatever makes you interesting, different and special is what I mean."

He was still frowning. "Thank you, Prentiss. Have a good weekend." He went to walk away.

"Hold on." She grabbed his arm and he looked back. "You don't believe me, do you? Why would I bother to lie about it? Trust me I don't care to build up the ego of yet one more man in this world. I meet enough egotistical jackasses. I wouldn't blow smoke up your ass."

"I should hope not."

"That means-"

"I know what that means."

Softly she assured him, desperate now to drive her point home if for no other reason than she felt lousy about herself that day and didn't want Reid to feel the same, "I meant it."

His frown became a look of intense concentration. "In that case there is one way to solve your problem."

"You know where I can find lots of men as intriguing as you? Point me in that direction!" she joked. "Look at me, taking dating advice from you. This is one for the record books."

"There isn't anywhere you can find an abundance of men such as myself. Though if you want a man who is intelligent you could try mensa, for starters, or your college alumni get togethers."

"Geez, thanks, Ried. I will get right on that," she said, sarcastically.

"Before you do I suggest you try an alternate course of action. A more direct route to finding a man such as myself for yourself. It will require you to be open minded but, in the end, you may just find the desired result."

"Open minded? The last time a man said that to me I ended up handcuffed to my bed. And wanting to kick his ass."

"Something like that should be a mutually agreed upon activity after careful thought and consideration to what boundaries each partner is comfortable with. Statistics show that only thirty percent of people enjoy being bound during sexual activity and a far fewer percentage actually require that to achieve-"

"Reid! What's your advice for me? I need to get home and drink a case of wine."

"Oh......I was going to suggest you consider, and I think if you think about it you will see that this idea is not as strange as it might at first sound-"

"Spit it out. Consider what? Speed dating? Asking someone to set me up? Trolling chess tournaments for geniuses with good morals and teeth? Not to mention a great ass."

"Are you referring to me?"

"Your advice, Reid. I'm tired and want to go home now. Come on, just say it."

"It seems circuitous to your goal to start a search for a man like me when I am, at present, uninvolved in any sort of romantic relationship. Ever since things went south with Austin I've been spending my evenings with the works of Sir Walter Releigh but I could instead escort you wherever it is Alan took you and show you if you were, in fact, right. If you would have more fun with a man like me over a man like him."

"I would have more fun with a bag of rattlesnakes than a man like him." She stared at Reid for a moment, trying to decipher why he was asking her out. "You're asking me on a date, right?"

He blushed a little. "You're the one who said that you would like a guy like me to show interest in you. Well you have that right now. So, you're move, Emily." The last few words were said with a slight challenge. The same way he said them when they played chess.

She got in her car, turned it on and rolled down the window. "My place. Tomorrow night. Eight thirty. We'll eat dinner in. You're move, Spencer."

With that said she drove away. When she was out on the street, stopped at a red light, Emily did a happy dance in her seat. When a stranger on the street laughed at her she flipped him off.

All that night she couldn't stop smiling. _Good bye, Alan, you reject_, she thought to herself, _And hello Dr. Spencer Reid_.

Someone had to bag that genius one of these days. She just never thought it would actually be her. It looked like her luck was turning around after all.

THE END


	4. To Take a Chance, Reid and Emily

**Note-** This is a follow up to the story right before this one: More Like You

**To Take A Chance**

**Emily and Reid**

**June 2010**

She never could have imagined being as nervous as she was when the doorbell rang that night. After spending all afternoon shopping for a new dress, and lingerie, cleaning her apartment, preparing a meal and picking out music to play while they ate Emily felt like she should be exhausted but she was far from it.

The nervous energy coursing through her made her feel like a live wire.

Even though she saw Reid almost every day she never before had been in even a slightly romantic situation with him. They didn't share smoldering looks across the bullpen or flirt like some of their co-workers did. She barely ever even touched him. Hell, Morgan touched him more affectionately than Emily ever had- and so did Penelope and JJ.

Tonight was entering whole new territory for Reid and Emily but she wanted this. Badly. She wanted it to feel good and natural. Because Reid was one of the only men she had met in years who was truly a good man she could see herself falling for.

Don't screw this up, she told herself as she smoothed out imaginary wrinkles on her dress and then opened the door to find him standing there in black cargo pants and a striped t-shirt. He looked casually delicious and more laid back then he did at work.

"Wow," he said, looking at her dress. "I should have dressed up, huh?"

"Don't worry about it. Get in here."

He walked inside. His eyes seemed to have a mind of their own because they raked over her little black perfect dress in a way Reid had never looked at Emily before. Then he concentrated on her face. "Honestly, you look lovely."

"Thanks," she said, in a dismissive way, because she was nervous. "So...yeah...hope you're hungry because I made a feast." Emily walked into the kitchen, leaving Reid just standing there rocking on his heels for a moment before he followed after her.

By the time he made it to her kitchen she had poured him a glass of wine and she was sipping her own.

He lifted the glass, smelled it, and then correctly named the type it was, babbling on about it for a minute.

She smirked. "You saw the bottle."

He gave her a small smile. "I never insinuated I didn't. After all, as a profiler, I'm sure you noticed me glancing at it so there would be no reason to pretend otherwise."

As Emily leaned against the counter, still holding her wine glass in one hand, their eyes met and held. Simmering heat lingered between them. Something new and different than they had ever known before. She felt it in her belly- a warmth pooling there that went beyond the simple lust she had for him before.

It was as if their mutual curiosity about what it would be like to kiss, to screw, to even hold hands and be intimate in their words and actions was given a life of its own- a presence in the room- and it was there with them. Tempting them to give in and go for this without worrying about the consequences and repercussions. They hadn't come very far yet and already she didn't want to dare turn away from him, from this, from them.

"So," he said, his eyebrows going up and down, as he broke the silent moment of them just gazing at each other "what did you prepare?"

"Turducken. It's a chicken inside of a duck inside of a turkey."

He startled a little. "Oh....interesting choice. That will be a first for me."

Emily chuckled. "Reid, it's a joke. I made coq au vin."

"Sounds good. Thank you for cooking for me."

"Feel special. I never cook for dates."

"Then I do feel special," he said, in a teasing way.

"Since you're in such a good mood then you can set the table. The china is over there in that cabinet."

He didn't move. She gave him a raised eyebrow. He asked "Oh...you're serious?"

"Why would I be joking about that? Should we eat off paper plates?" she teased.

"No, of course not. I just didn't realize you would put your guest to work."

"You're not a guest. You're Reid."

He shook his head at that logic but gave her a small smile then went to work on setting the table, which she helped him do. Working side by side as Reid explained about the reasons that the silverware went where it did was a moment where Emily was vividly aware that Reid was not just a co-worker or a buddy. He was a man. In her home. For a date.

Her body tingled at the thought and she found her breath hitching in her throat. She watched him for a moment longer than normal- concentrating on his lips, his strong jaw, his bobbing Adam's apple- and then forced herself to pull her eyes away.

Emily chuckled nervously. "All right. Lets do this."

She moved around him to go into the kitchen again but Reid asked "Excuse me?" which paused her steps.

"Lets have dinner. What did you think I meant?"

His face gave her a blank look but she had the feeling he was just teasing her. For the longest time she didn't get his sense of humor. It frustrated her to not know when he truly was confused about something and when he was just messing with her or the team. Now she tried to laugh it all because she realized he messed with them a lot more than most of them got. Which was funny in its own twisted way.

She was surprised when his long, lanky fingers wrapped around her waist and pulled her closer to him, but not close enough to press against him.

Reid said "You are a ball of nerves. That's not good for your digestion." His words were spoken in this in charge, sensual way that Emily had never heard Reid sound before. As if he was coaching her, but in a firm way, to let go of her fears and relax.

_Good God_, she thought, _if I knew he could sound that sexy I would have jumped him years ago_.

"I'm fine," she said, her voice suddenly hoarse.

"Its just me, Emily," he said, still speaking in that low tone that made shivers shoot through her.

"I know that. Duh. Its just you and me and we're just sharing a meal. No big thing, right?"

"Well I can't agree with that as we are taking our friendship to a completely new place. That could be rather....strange and almost frightening....but it doesn't have to be." Now the Reid she knew best was back in full force and she felt the need to reassure him.

"That's right. Hey, think of it this way, most times on a first date you don't know if you're getting a prize or an unsub. This way we both know what we're getting into with each other."

"Yet there is still so much that we don't know about each other." His fingers circled her wrist, his thumb rubbing lazily over the pulse point and then his hand moved down to brush against her hand and intertwine their fingers briefly before pulling his hand away, as he stepped back.

"Well," she said with a smile, making her voice sound light and breezily, "here is our chance to find out!" Then she went to the kitchen to get the salad that would start off their meal.

During dinner the fact that Reid could talk at great length about almost any subject came in handy because Emily could sit and listen to him for long stretches, then break in with a comment or a joke, but she didn't have to worry about awkward silences. He could happily ramble forever if no one stopped him.

That night she found him fascinating. Especially when he brought up the star puzzle and explained that he had researched the story behind it more and learned more facts and details about it.

He then went on about other romantic myths in different cultures, seeming to have learned one for every major country, and finally Emily stopped him.

She said "I thought you said that stuff like that doesn't make any sense to you. Are you becoming a believer?"

"I never said it made sense. I'm just explaining what these cultures believe. Of course its just folklore with no basis in science. Its not as if any of these stories are true or believing them can make what they promise a reality."

"How very romantic," she teased. "You know, Reid, you are quite the linear thinker. Ever considered seeing the shades of gray?"

He thought about it. "Actually, no."

She laughed and he gave her a small smile. Surprising her again he reached out with one hand and ran a finger over the top of her hand, that rested on the table, as his dark eyes held onto hers, making the temperature in the room feel like it rocketed up thousands of degrees.

"Thank you for having me over, Emily. This is....nice."

"Nice?" she snarked. "Geez, thanks. Can't you think up a better word?"

"What's wrong with nice?"

"Its boring."

"How about..." his finger traced up over her wrist and she shivered a little before he added "enlightening?"

"Snooze."

"How would you describe this night so far then?"

"Smoldering."

Their eyes held for a moment. Emily slowly rose from the table, picked up some dishes and went to the kitchen. While she was in there she heard the music change and then the volume get cranked up.

Emily slowly headed back out to the other room and saw Reid by her stereo system.

"You have Sinatra," Reid said.

"That I do."

He had put on September song. After a long moment of staring at him tenderly Emily walked closer and without talking about it Reid took her into his arms. It was the most romantic, quiet, intimate dance of her life. Their eyes stayed on each other, revealing a want they had never shown before.

She thought about bringing her hand off his shoulder to caress his face, leading him into a kiss, but before she could he was pressing a kiss to her temple, then to her cheek and then his mouth was hovering near hers, making her crave the knowledge of what his lips might feel like against hers.

Suddenly he tipped her backwards and she yelped. Blood rushed to her head and then his lips were very sweetly against hers. He pulled her up, as their lips stayed pressed together, and when he pulled back she felt lightheaded and stunned.

Her eyes went wide. "You, Reid, you....are a revelation."

"What does that mean?"

"It means kiss me again."

His eyes were light with happiness but also dark with hunger at the same time. There was a little boy's enthusiasm mixed with a grown man's desire resting in those dark eyes of his. A quiet confidence about him mixed with an uncertainty that may never fade away.....or maybe she could stamp that out if she could make him see himself as she saw him.

Dr. Spencer Reid was completely unlike anyone else in the world. And that is what Emily found she liked best about him.

THE END


	5. Before I Ever Knew Better, Reid and JJ

**Note- the title comes from a Sara Bareilles song**

**Before I Ever Knew Better**

**Reid and JJ**

**June 2012**

Her kiss tasted as sweet as the vanilla ice cream with fresh strawberries on top that they had eaten after dinner that night. The feel of her soft lips pressed to his felt more like home than he had found in twenty years. Her arms wrapped tight around his neck, pulling him ever closer to her, urged him to give in to her sensual assault- to slide his fingers down till he could push away the straps of her tank top and take her right here and now on the soft grass of her backyard while her son slept inside clueless to the mess that the adults in his life were making as one got caught up in good intentions while the other drowned in grief.

"I never loved Will," that's what she whispered the night of the funeral when Spencer Reid brought JJ home. Her words were numb, devoid of any screaming emotion like guilt or rage, but a condemnation of herself all the same. "I used him."

Used him to escape her feelings for another. Used him to have a place to go on weekends and be different than usual self for that first year. Used him to be a stay-at-home father to Henry. Used him to make herself feel loved because he had adored her.

She might deny it now but JJ had love Will. Reid knew that. The ironic thing is that if she hadn't loved Will as deeply as she had then she wouldn't be kissing Reid right now.

He pulled back a breath and murmured "This is transference. You know that."

"For the love of God," she muttered in frustration, her lips already moving nearer again, "shut up and shut off that brain for a while."

Those perfect, sweet, lush lips of hers attacked him then. Begging for more. Her tongue seeking entrance to his mouth. His traitorous mouth ignoring what his mind knew was best and opening for her- desperate to feel her tongue tangle against his, her breasts press against his chest, her smell and sounds when she was making love surrounding them and giving him his first small glimpse of her like this.

So different than their hasty good night kiss at her car after their football game date years and years before. Back when he didn't know a thing about women. Didn't know she was running scared from her feelings. Didn't know she needed him to take control of them. Things would be different for them now if he knew just a sliver then of what he knows about love, her and life now.

He wishes he didn't know now though. Because it's the knowing that makes him push away the only kiss that really has ever felt perfect.

"I....can't," he told her, his tone filled with regret but with no room to give. He won't be talked into letting her use him as a surrogate for her dead husband.

Will's death came suddenly. An illness that took him after less than a week. Almost something that didn't seem possible- one of those things that happen to other people- but it was possible and it had happened to him. JJ is one huge ball of guilt now. She was out of town when he fell ill. She should have been home, she insists. She should have noticed before she left that he wasn't feeling well. She should have spent more time with him in the years they had together. She should have married him. She should have done more than just appreciate how he was a good father but appreciate how he was a good partner for her. She shouldn't have looked at him and wanted him to be someone else, to go somewhere else, to never have gotten her pregnant so that Henry's father could be someone else. But that was only how she looked at him sometimes. Other times he was just what she wanted and just who she loved. She can't remember that now though. She's too lost in her pain to recall how it really was. The good memories don't feed her guilt so she blocks them out as if they never existed at all.

Reid knew that when he started to spend all his spare time with her and Henry after the funeral that JJ would read more into it than he intended. That she would lean so hard on him she would re-write history and say she had always loved him most instead of the truth: She loved him in her own way, a way that would never end, but she also gave her heart and her body and five years to Will.

Its not that Reid doubts that JJ has strong feelings for him. He knows she does. But its not right to become lovers less than six weeks after burying Will. Not when this is more about a dead man than about them.

He won't let her take what could be there only chance to be lovers and squander it by making it another thing to feel guilty about. She will think he is pushing her away to be noble, he believes, or because he's still, deep inside, a kid who is afraid of sex and messy love affairs.

But he's pushing her away because he wants her to kiss him for him- just him- not because she's grieving and looking for a life preserver. Because if he lets her use him that way then when she is strong again she'll back away from being lovers, which would only be right because she wouldn't need that anymore to survive. She would be strong enough again to stand on her own two feet.

More than anything Reid has been trying to help JJ feel strong like that again. But not this way. Not sacrificing what should be their most beautiful moment ever shared together by letting it become just another thing to feel sick and guilty over later.

Her blue eyes burned with a light sheen of tears and shimmered with desperation. "I need you."

He took her hand. It felt small, cold, but right encompassed in his larger one. "I'm right here but I can't....Not when you would close your eyes and see Will."

She jerked her hand away, stood up, ran her hands through her long blonde hair. Paced around, shooting him dirty looks. He stood up and waited for her to relax.

Finally she cried his name, the sound so lost that it made his heart ache, "Spence!"

A few large steps and he was holding her. He stroked her hair. Later they went inside, had coffee and talked about how Henry was doing in pre-school. Reid knew that soon he would need to ease back from JJ's life outside of work. Let her see that she could make it without his everyday, every hour, every minute support.

But tonight wasn't the night to make that transition. As they sat at her kitchen table, reminders of Will still all around the house, Reid took JJ's hand and squeezed it. One day she would forgive herself for all the ways she let Will down.

After the days turned to months and maybe to years JJ might even find her lips pressed against the lips of the man who didn't know enough back when they first met to keep her but knows enough now to make sure that if he gets her back again it is for all the right reasons and that their chance is a real one that could last.

When it comes to loving JJ Spence would never accept anything less.

**THE END**


	6. Love Is Biology, Reid and Emily

**Love Is Biology **

**Note-**_Mick Rawson was introduced in season five, episode eighteen which was titled The Fight. He works on another team in the BAU_**.**

**Part One**

**May 2010**

Dr. Spencer Reid is very analytical. He can see everything for what it is in stark scientific terms- even emotions such as love, hate, anger, bitterness, regret and jealousy. They are all caused by certain innate psychological and physiological factors.

He has been jealous before and knows what it feels like. Knows the burning in his chest and the bitterness on his tongue. The way his face gets hot and he gets completely silent.

He understands all this is simply his biological response to the feeling of jealousy-which is different but similar to envy (he could go on for hours on the subtle differences between the two). What he does not understand is why he is feeling it in this particular situation.

Why seeing SSA Mick Rawson hanging out every damn day at Emily's desk is provoking this unwanted emotion in him. The only logical answer he can find for it is that his good friend, SSA Derek Morgan (who sits just a desk away right now smirking over this whole frustrating and uncomfortable situation) has infiltrated Spencer's subconscious with his stupid and idiotic joke a few months back.

__

"Hey," Derek said, looping his arm over Reid's shoulder as they walked away from the jet after coming home from a case. Putting his mouth near Reid's ear he said "I think Prentiss has a thing for you."

Reid had made a sound that meant: Yeah, right! You're crazy!

"No, I'm serious, pretty boy." Derek moved away from him and started to walk backwards in front of Reid. "That star puzzle thing....that was all about you."

"That was a myth that makes no sense. How could that be about me? And in what universe would Emily have a thing for me?"

The idea was ridiculous. It had taken them a year just to become friends. Now two years after that had somehow managed to happen she suddenly got hot for his body? Unlikely. Very far to the edge of the realm of possibilities, as Reid saw the world, at least.

"Hey, who am I? I'm Derek Morgan and I know these things. Remember when you thought she had a crush on me? Now that was way off base. But this....this is smack dab center bullseye. She wants to get with my boy. Mark my words. Just think about it, man. Prentiss is all sorts of hot, right?"

"By standard beauty definitions, yes, she is clinically attractive."

"Come on, man!"

"Fine, yeah, she's hot, Morgan."

"Yeah, she is," he said in a total piggish way that he never would dare let the women on the team hear him say about Emily or JJ. "So....?"

"So?" Reid asked as they made it to his car.

"Would you ever wanna get with her?"

Reid just shot Derek a look that said: You disgust me with the way you talk about our good friend. I am so much above you because I can see pass sex.

Derek laughed and said "Oh, yeah, you'd get with her, kid, given the chance. And I'm telling you," he flashed a big smile before he headed for his own car "you got a chance! Go for it! He shoots. He scores! The crowd goes wild! Think about it, kid! Prentiss might snap out of this soon. You better strike while the iron's hot."

Reid looked across the military airfield parking lot to see the rest of the team far away getting in their vehicles. Thank God no one had heard Derek carrying on. Because he was completely over exaggerating the significance of Emily's behavior on the jet today. Reid could not see how that star puzzle had anything to do with himself in any sort of way whatsoever. Morgan always had sex on the brain and always claimed women were hot for Reid when they so very obviously were not. Morgan had talked Reid into pursuing women before and the results were never satisfactory in the long term. This time Reid just brushed off what Morgan said because he discounted the veracity of his statements.

At least he told himself to brush it off. Of course the mind does what it does and Reid's mind squirreled away that conversation so that when Mick Rawson started coming around all the thoughts Derek had planted in Reid's mind months before rose to the surface again making Reid see red.

Or green, as the case may be.

Mick flirted with Emily "So, luv, you will change before we meet at the bar tonight, right?"

She rolled her eyes. "Um, no! What's wrong with what I'm wearing anyway?"

He rolled his eyes. "I can see none of your sexy thighs," he answered, because she had on black pants. "And that just won't do."

If Reid had to sit through one more afternoon of these daily chat sessions that dripped with sexual innuendo he was not going to be responsible for what happened next to SSA Rawson. Reid's jaw ticked as he tried to concentrate on his paperwork and cursed himself for forgetting his ipod that day- which he had been using for the last week to drown out Mick's voice whenever he came by.

That had helped matters marginally.

The only problem was that the noise in his ears didn't affect Reid's eyesight and he could still see Emily smiling and laughing over the bad come on lines that were being volleyed at her relentlessly. The only upside was she acted as if she did not want to get with Rawson. But then again she did hang out with him. Maybe she was just saying no as part of a cat- and-mouse game. Maybe in private she said yes, yes, yes....Reid snapped a pencil in two.

Morgan laughed. Prentiss and Rawson looked at Reid.

Emily joked "Hey, go easy on that poor thing. What did it ever do to you?"

"I need coffee," Reid said, as he rose and headed away from them with quick long steps.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Emily threw Derek a raised eyebrow look. "What is up with Reid lately?"

Derek shrugged, wearing this annoying smirk that said: I know something you don't know.

Emily shook her head at him and turned back to Mick, who was perched on her desk, "Could you..." she motioned for him to move and he did. "I have paperwork up to my eyeballs to do so...be gone."

Mick laughed. "You always tell me to leave but you always watch me walk away."

"You wish."

"I know." With a smile on his lips he headed out of the bullpen. But called back. "A skirt, darlin. With lots of thigh."

"Keep dreaming!" she shot back.

He had been gone just a minute, and she was finally getting back into her paperwork after being distracted, when Derek asked "So what's the deal with you two?"

Looking up she gave him a blank look. "Who? Me and Rawson?"

"Yeah. You two together now or something?"

She laughed. "Yeah, something."

"Oh yeah?"

"No! Don't be ridiculous. He's not my type."

"Looks like he's interested."

"Good for him. We're kinda friends and that is all its ever gonna be. I told him that. He'll get it through his head eventually and if he wants to be friends, cool, and if not then that's fine too."

"So you're hanging out with him even though you know he's playing at this friend thing just to try and get with you?"

She shrugged. "What can I say? He amuses me." She chuckled and got back down to work.

Soon Reid came back, looking flustered and stuck deep in his thoughts, Emily gave Derek another raised eyebrow look but Derek, as usual, only gave her a look back that said he knew everything that was going on but she just didn't see it. As if it was completely obvious.

Not to her. She hated to think she was missing whatever it was that was upsetting Reid lately. That he might need someone to reach out to him and she wasn't paying attention enough to figure it out.

Later that day, when they were alone in the break room, she asked him "Hey.....you doing okay?"

"What would make you think I'm not? Do I not seem to be okay to you?"

She held up her hands. "Whoa, defensive much?"

"There is nothing abnormal about me lately, Prentiss," he said and walked away.

She stood there feeling deflated and blown off by him once again, which was nothing new. Sometimes he did that to her. But never did he realize how much it hurt her. He just didn't see her that way- as someone who had deep feelings for him- and it seemed no amount of trying to get closer to him would ever make him look at her different. For the longest time she had tried- so long that its embarrassing to think about now- while also dating losers who didn't measure up to her sexy, genius co-worker.

Now she had stopped trying. He would never get it. It was about time to get over him. The only problem with that was as much as the analytical side of her brain told her to give up her hopeless unrequited love for him the emotional part of her brain said that was a lot easier said than done and reminded her that, after all this time, she hadn't pulled that trick off yet.

Still she was trying. Now she was trying to move on instead of trying to get him to want to be more with her. Even to just be a closer friend.

Not that Spencer had a clue what she was doing. No, he seemed as clueless as ever- adorably yet frustratingly clueless.

She let out a long sigh as she watched him walk out of the break room, staring at him till he disappeared from sight, then she turned back to the coffee machine and poured himself a cup. She needed a break from her desk and from the guys who got on her nerves in the BAU.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

To say she was shocked when Reid walked up to her at the bar that night would be putting it lightly. She could have been knocked over with a feather to see him there and know he came there with the express purpose of seeing her.

Emily was sitting on a bar stool while Mick was leaning on the bar, beer in hand, chatting her up. They were both smiling and joking. That is until, out of nowhere, Reid was standing next to them, looking intensely serious.

"Reid!" she cried "Hey?!"

Looking around him she didn't see the rest of the team or anyone he could be there with. He said "You're right. Something is bothering me lately."


	7. Part Two of Love Is Biology, Reid and Em

**Love Is Biology **

**Part Two**

**Spencer and Emily **

**May 2010**

Standing in the bar Reid told Emily "You're right. Something is bothering me lately."

Mick said, as he slapped a hand on Reid's back, "Well, mate, tis a shame. Have some ale and maybe you'll feel better. And if not then have another and at least you'll be sloshed so whatever it is won't seem so dire anymore. Always works for me. Now, not to be blunt, but we were in the middle of something so..."

Reid plucked Mick's hand off him. The way he did it said that if Mick touched him again he was gonna twist that arm around his back and not stop till he heard bones crunching. This concerned Emily because Reid was normally never upset except about bullies and Mick, though brusque, wasn't really a bully. Still he had clearly managed to rub Reid the wrong way.

Looking at Mick she asked "Can you...." she motioned for him to leave "give us five minutes?"

"Luv, you were just about to tell me about that time you skinny dipped in the Seine."

She rolled her eyes. "I got naked and jumped in. There. Now you heard the story. Now, really, I need five minutes so..." she was starting to get pissed at Mick.

He didn't understand what a big deal it was for Reid to seek her out to talk. She would be damned if the likes of British flirt Mick Rawson ruined Reid's chance to confide in her.

Reid said "Actually, that's fine, he can stay where he is since it seems to be such an imposition to allow us a brief amount of privacy."

Now Emily was fuming. That's it. She was gonna kick Mick's ass from here to China for messing this up. Reid would never say what was truly bothering him in front of a third party. And if Reid needed help Emily wanted to give it to him but Mick, who was a couple of pints in, couldn't stop being an alpha dog long enough to back down.

That was why he was not her type and never would be.

Reid paused for a moment and looked at Emily. "Would you like to dance? That way we can speak privately."

"Uh...sure! Okay!" She was flabbergasted. Reid hadn't ever seemed to much like dancing before he hurt his knee and now she certainly didn't expect that to have changed any.

They moved to the dance floor and into each other's arm. The bar was not known for playing all that many slow songs so the beat was kinda fast and they looked a little strange slow dancing to it but that is how Reid took her into an embrace and so she just went with it.

Chuckling nervous, after a moment, she said "Wow, you aren't half bad."

"Really? I haven't danced since..."

"College?" she teased.

"No but years ago. JJ and I used to dance here sometimes. Rarely. That was a long time ago and it doesn't relate any to what I came here to tell you except in one purely tangential way."

"Oh, okay. So you've been upset lately because of JJ?" She watched his face scrunched up and then she amended. "A woman? Come on, Reid, help me out here."

After a long moment he said "I learned a harsh lesson about ignoring latent desires, that's how it relates."

"You've lost me now. But I do wanna follow you so why don't you back up and start at the beginning or, since its you and the beginning might involve a recitation of the history of the world, try the middle."

Just then her cell rang. She grimaced and shot Mick a dirty look. It was his ring tone and she knew he was just messing with her. He smiled and crooked his finger at her, encouraging her to come back to his side.

Spencer followed her eyes. "I dislike him immensely. Do you think that's unfair of me?"

"He's an acquired taste. Ignore him. I am. So, go ahead, what were you saying?"

"Do you enjoy his company?"

"Rawson? He's all right, I guess. He's funny but he can get to be annoying too." Her phone rang again with Rawson's ring tone. "Case in point. He's kinda childish sometimes and yet strangely fun to be around at other times. But who cares about him right now? Come on, talk to me. What's up with you? I've been worried about you lately."

"I've been obsessing somewhat recently on things that make no logical sense."

"Oh yeah? Like what? And don't say tangential again. Get to the point this time."

"I feel an unhealthy rage and it is all directed squarely at Rawson."

Emily looked over her shoulder at the other BAU agent. He gave her begging hands, like he was praying, as he pleaded for her to come back. "Rawson? Why? Did he say something to you that was rude?"

Anger bubbled up in her just thinking about what Mick might have said to upset Reid to this point. It had to be really awful but what could it have been?

Reid told her "He doesn't speak to me much, certainly never if you're not around. I would assume he can feel my dislike for him and, as a profiler, guesses what it is relating to."

"Reid, what did that jackass do?"

They danced in silence for a moment before Reid said "He has a crush on you."

"Yeah, so what? That doesn't mean I'll blow off him hurting one of my friends. So spit it out. What went down? If you're here then I know its big so what is it?"

"He _has_ a crush on you."

"You said that already."

"That's what it is. I hate him for having a crush on you. Like I said...illogical."

She stared at him for a long moment. "I don't understand." Of course, a part of her did have a clue but she couldn't believe that Reid may actually be jealous of a guy who was into her. "Wait a minute, is this because you feel protective of me? Cause that's sweet but I can kick his ass, if need be, so don't worry about him jerking me around....is that it?"

"That I feel he could hurt you? Perhaps, I suppose, that could be a part of it, yes, but...in all honesty...no, it is not the greater part of my issue with him."

"Then what? You're gonna have to spell it out for me."

He stopped dancing and let go of her. She startled. He took her hands and pressed them both over his heart. "The heart pumps an increased amount of blood at a faster rate than normal when sexually stimulated or romantically inclined and over the last few months, and the last month especially, I find that mine is experiencing this condition when in proximity to you."

She stared at him for a long moment, in a happy daze, and then smiled, moving closer to him and wrapping one arm around his neck. "That is very interesting to know, Dr. Reid."

"Do you really think so? Because I could tell you much more, if you would like to listen."

"Tell me more," she said, making it clear she was happy to hear he was into her but the only thing she wanted, rather than dry medical facts, was a kiss.

Reid leaned over and slowly brought his mouth to hers in a tentative first kiss while Mick, at the bar, threw up his hands, rolled his eyes and told the bartender "That mate just nicked my dame."

Emily was all smiles when she pulled out of her kiss with Reid. "So that's why you hate Rawson, huh? You're right. Its completely illogical."

"I do know that. The likelihood of you and I making any sort of sense is almost nil."

She pushed at his shoulder. "God, Reid, for being a brain you can be dumb. That's not what I meant. Ugh. Thanks a lot! And just why would you and I make no sense, huh? No forget it! I don't wanna know! You will not kill my buzz." She calmed down and smiled at him. Moving close she took his hand and then wrapped his other around her waist and they started to dance again. "What I meant was that it is illogical to hate him for spending time with me because I would rather spend time with you....you just could never see it and so I thought...what the hell? You know. A woman can only flirt so much before she gives up."

"You've been flirting with me?"

"DUH!" She chuckled and leaned her head forward so that her forehead was against his shoulder for a minute and then looked up. "Embarrassing, huh? You never even gave me a second look till, I guess, Rawson showed up. Huh. I owe that guy a beer, for sure."

"It was rude of me to interrupt your date. Not very gentleman like, I'm afraid."

"Reid, don't worry about it. It wasn't a date and even if it was, if you felt like this about me then you damn well better interrupt my date or even my wedding ceremony.....cause I'd wanna know. I'm glad you came here and gave me a biology lesson on the heart."

"It is one of the most vital organs of the human body. It's not healthy to ignore it."

She smirked. "Oh, I totally agree. Very unhealthy to ignore its impulses. I wouldn't want you to get sick. You better listen to whatever it wants from now on."

"I suppose it's a matter of my health so I must."

They danced for a moment in silence, a soft smile on her lips. He lifted his hand off her waist and ran a finger down her cheek. Reid said "I was sure this would end badly today but you're happier than I've ever known you to be....huh, and its over me."

"Don't be so shocked. Why shouldn't it be you that makes me happy? Should it be a guy like Rawson?" She rolled her eyes. "He doesn't have the qualities I look for in a date."

"He doesn't?"

"Not at all."

"That's surprising."

She chuckled. "Only to you and probably him. He wants to think I am just kidding when I say I don't want him but I'm dead serious and you....can't see how awesome you are." She jabbed his chest playfully. "Lucky for you that I can."

"I agree. It is lucky for me."

She chuckled again. "You better! You can't lead me on like this and then not give it up."

"It?" he joked, pretending to be clueless.

"Yeah, _it," _she teased. "I'm sure you have some statistics about how _it_ is important to courtship."

"Oh, it!" he joked. "Yes, _it _does play a large part in the successfulness of a pair bond."

Titling her head and moving in for a kiss she murmured "You bet your ass it does."

His lips pressed against hers once more in a sweet kiss that promised a romantic future she had been waiting a very long time to have with him.

Once they finally left the dance floor they realized Mick Rawson was long gone. Days later he came back around Emily's desk to tell her he was happy for them and offer to buy them a drink sometime. He played off his disappointment but it was clear his smile was hiding a little bit of pain. Mick was the type to bounce back quickly, though.

Emily was way too happy and excited at that point to really focus on him anyway. That night was going to be her first sleep over with Reid, after three nights of going out together. Reid told her each night they could wait. But why would she wanna wait?

She had been waiting for way longer than he even knew already. Tonight would end the very long wait and take Spencer Reid officially out of her fantasies and into her bed.

Thank God he had gotten jealous. He was so different than other men, in the way his scientific based brain worked, but when it came to some things he was just the same as all men all over the world. When he saw another man moving in on the woman he wanted he felt a burning ache in his bones and he had to do something to make that end.

Mick coming into her life had really changed things for the better. Just not in the way that Mick would have wanted. It was just the way that Emily Prentiss wanted though.

That night she was gonna show Spencer that and make it so he got it through his head once and for all just how much she cared about him and where he needed to be spending all his nights. No more sleeping alone imagining his caresses, his hot skin moving against hers, and his mouth sucking on her till she whimpered.

No more being lonely. No wonder she couldn't stop smiling as she did her paperwork. Now if only Morgan would stop smirking because he had been right all along about her and Reid being hot for each other.

Then this day would be perfect.

THE END


	8. What Might Have Been, Reid and JJ

**What Might Have Been**

**Spencer and JJ**

She knew it was wrong. No one had to tell her it was wrong. A woman knows. Its that little guilty feeling in her gut. The goose bumps on her skin from doing something illicit. The fear of getting caught, being discovered.

But what was there to catch her doing really?

What she was doing wasn't outwardly wrong in the least. She had invited her very good friend over for dinner. Just because her boyfriend was out of town didn't make it inherently wrong.

Will knew that Spence had a place in JJ's life that no one else could touch. More than just her co-worker or her ex. He was simply essential to her life. A vital part of her family. She would never allow the changes- the growing up they were doing- to push him away from her.

It wasn't wrong to spend time with him. It wasn't wrong to want Henry to know Spence and them to have a tight relationship. And it wasn't wrong to care deeply for her friend.

On the outside she could make it all look perfectly acceptable. But deep inside she knew how wrong it was what she was doing that night. All because she was more excited to have Spence over to spend an evening with her than she was to spend time with Will.

It made JJ feel guilty and ashamed. Will was good to her. Things between them were good. He was excellent father. If she didn't think too hard about how she really wanted her life to be like or remember too much what it felt like when it was Spence's lips ghosting over her body in the middle of the night then she could be happy with Will.

It was her own damn fault for obsessing over an affair that ended years ago. For wanting things she knew she could never have.

_(Don't know where to put you anymore._

_You can't be kept inside my dresser drawer._

_I find the pieces of you in my dreams and in the evenings_)

Her life worked only one way- with Will taking care of Henry and her living with them so she could see her son as much as possible, and so that he had a strong family. Her whole world would crumble if she walked out on Will. She couldn't do that to herself, to Will or to Henry.

So she wouldn't leave. She'd never leave. Not for another decade or more could she even think about leaving. Knowing that made it hard to breathe. It was easy when she just pretended the happy life Will gave her was the happy life that she wanted most.

Sometimes she could pretend enough to actually feel happy. Then Will would go back to Louisiana for a weekend and the rush of feelings would come again. The rush of hope. The rush of excitement.

The longing and the hunger. For just one night she could have Spence over and they could live the way they might live in this house if she hadn't been scared and stupid back when they met.

_(Spill out the edges of my mind._

_Memories of you feel like they're miles wide._

_Its all I can do to get to the other side of these evenings_)

Its so wrong to be like this. But this is who Jennifer Jareau is and she doesn't think she'll ever change. She doesn't even think she wants to. Because to change means to give up these stolen nights with Spence. And she doesn't think she can. Even the times, like now, when he has a girlfriend it doesn't stop her from asking him to take time away from her and come over for dinner.

_(I'll see you tonight_

_in the back of my mind_

_when I remember your skin_

_like I remembered you then)_

Nothing can stop her. The desire to have her evenings with him is too intense. If only she wanted him this fiercely back when it was all easy and possible for them. If only she hadn't been a child in so many ways still. Afraid to commit. Afraid to open up. Fast to push away. Fast to hide under layers. Fast to put up walls.

Why he didn't start hating her years ago she'll never know. But he doesn't. He still cares and tonight he is coming over to spend time with her and her son. Tonight Spence is giving JJ another glimpse of what might have been.

_(When you would dress me in white_

_with the look in your eye_

_knew you'd love me forever_

_before I ever knew better)_

Much later that night she sits on Henry's bed while Spencer holds him and reads to him a bedtime story. She laughs at how Spencer never gets the fables. Reaching her hand out she lays it on his leg.

The image is perfect to her. They are a happy family for a few minutes. She doesn't care if she's delusional. She needs this fantasy to survive her real life.

When she told Pen about how the feelings for Spence never went away- as she stood in front of yet another hospital and cried because he was shot in the leg, not wanting to go inside and cry in front of anyone- Penelope had asked her to consider telling Spence himself. Then maybe together they could see if they both wanted to change their lives and find a way to be together. Maybe he would leave his girlfriend for JJ. Maybe she could, in fact, be brave enough to leave the security of being with Will. Maybe Spence wanted to give her still all JJ wouldn't allow him to give her before.

But JJ had brushed off that advice. She had to stay in control. She had to keep the house of cards all in place. She couldn't risk everything. So she told herself she only wanted Spence now because it was a good fantasy to have for a pratically married mom.

Will has long since stopped trying to get her down the aisle, which is good, because she feels sick when she thinks of saying those vows to him. She does love Will. She's just in love with Spence. And it's a love that grows in drips and drabs each day. In small, small moments. But it does grow.

Tonight its growing. Even if its so wrong to let it. She won't try and stop it. This is the best part of JJ's life, other than having Henry. But even Henry doesn't know how much his godfather means to Mommy. Her son is young. He can't see she's a fraud and she's not fearless. He can't tell she settling for less so that Henry might have more. She doesn't want him to ever feel like he was a mistake.

She loves her little boy. And that's why she does love Will. For being good to her and Henry. Its just that she is only really herself when Spence is in the room. Its what she has come to face a little at a time over many years. She's worked her way through her twenties and finally she can look in the mirror and be honest with herself.

JJ just can't be honest with the world yet. So only Pen knows the truth. And maybe only Pen will ever know.

That night they stay in Henry's room till he falls asleep, his little hand clutching Spence's sweater.

JJ says "He really loves you."

"I love him too. He's a great kid. Did you notice how much his vocabulary is growing lately? He's very bright."

"Maybe you are rubbing off on him."

"Do you think so? I'm not around him that much so I don't see how- "

"You should come around more," she says it but she knows its impossible. Its all so impossible.

Spence just gives her a sad smile. His eyes go back to looking at her son. Spence had a girlfriend to go home and call, say goodnight and how he loves her. JJ is glad he has someone. Yet she never wants to lay eyes on this woman in person. And they don't talk about her much either.

Instead she teases Spence mercilessly and they play like two teenagers when they have spare time at work. He makes her life better in so many ways. She needs him still so much. But she'll take what she can get.

(_Can't see myself back beside you_

_but I see nobody else._

_Nobody's perfect but I'm perfectly happy_

_to keep on bringing this love off the shelf_.)

Spence presses a kiss to Henry's head. "Sleep well, small prince."

JJ and Spence go out to the living room and he says "I should go."

"Really? We could watch TV or something? I'm sure there must be some decent movie on you haven't seen yet."

He gives her an amused look. "I never see anything. You know that."

She laughs. "Right. We should work on that."

"Pop culture isn't my passion."

"Still you should be up to date about the world."

"Why?"

She laughs. "Just because, everyone talks about stuff and you have no clue what they are referring to."

"I think we've had this conversation before," he says, in a serious tone which only makes her laugh harder. After she calms down there is a comfortable silence and she says "Well, night then. See you at work, I guess. Thanks for coming over. I hate being here alone when Will is out of town. I think its our job getting in my subconscious or something. Like if I'm alone an unsub will know and show up. Stupid, right?"

"No, its actually a very understandable fear considering our job. Call me if you want later. If you can't sleep."

"I'll be fine." Sure, she's always fine, isn't she? Just fine. Sure. "Night, Spence."

"Night, JJ."

She gives him a hug that lasts a little too long until he pulls away and leaves without looking at her again, as if he knows she has tears in her eyes and is trying to spare her the embarrassment. She blinks them back, takes in a deep breath and lets it out.

Her night with Spence is over. It was perfect but it couldn't last. Maybe she only wants this because she is scared to commit to Will completely.

That's a good lie to tell herself. Too bad that JJ can't even fool herself and make herself believe that one.

_(Better off,_

_I couldn't say_

_if I'd be better off without a love I live without anyway._

_Better off, ohhh, who knows?_

_See you tonight_) (Sara Bareilles)

**THE END**


	9. The Long Way Home, Reid and Em

**Note- **_I was thrilled to see MGG haircut! I think I may be in the minority though. Anyway this fic starts after season five episode 22 which was called The Internet is Forever_**.**

**The Long Way Home**

**Emily and Spencer**

**Part One**

"Why did you cut your hair?"

"Someone told me it would look better."

"What's her name?"

"Heather."

"I don't know. I think Heather might have been mistaken."

"You do?"

"Your hair looked, I don't know, sort of dashing longer. But what do I know?"

Often she sat across from him on the jet when they were going home. Today she sat next to him. It was always her that would seek out him- never the other way around.

He knew she believed he had no idea of her feelings for him. But he wasn't as clueless as she assumed. For a very long time he had suspected- almost two years ago was his first inkling that she cared for him as more than a simple co-worker- but he cast off those suspicions and theories time and time again until one day just last week when she on the phone, at her desk, speaking to SSA Mick Rawson.

One moment where Dr. Spencer Reid could no longer blow off what had been running around the back of his mind for years now.

Letting out a heavy sigh she finally gave in to Mick's flirting and agreed to a date. It was what she did next that cemented her crush on Spencer in his mind. Her eyes moved to him and he happened to look up at the same time. The longing and sadness in her eyes was unmasked because she thought he was deep in his paperwork and not about to notice one fleeting look from her.

Seeing her raw pain made him feel guilty and cowardly. There were many reasons he never made a move on her but now they all seemed ridiculous and childish. His old feelings for other women, his fears of rejection, his belief he could never make someone like her happy and she didn't know what she really wanted if she thought she wanted him. All of it now-and all the wasted days with women who only broke his fragile heart apart time after time- seemed to him like a travesty. What he would give to have done it all different.

But now she had a date with another guy. And Spencer didn't think this would be the brightest time to say "It might have taken me a couple years but....me too."

Knowing he had made a mess out of whatever chances he ever had with Emily Prentiss did not stop his growing want of her. He might have started falling for her way after she first saw something worthy in him- worthy of friendship first, of caring, or trying to connect- but there was no doubt that now, in this last week especially, his feelings were growing at a staggering pace.

Just to see her now was almost painful. That is how much he ached to reach out and run his knuckles tenderly over her cheek.

That is just what he wanted to do now, in fact. But Derek was sitting across from them, with his head phones off, watching their every move: observing body language and smirking. Besides there was Mick now. It seemed there was always a reason to not make a move on Emily.

But only lately did he find more and more reasons to make a move. For instance, one very good reason was that she was lingering in his mind even when they were away from each other. And that had never happened before last week.

It made her presence in his life, his head, his heart, his soul, and his whole world seem larger than it ever was before. It made what they might have if he did make even the smallest of moves seem real in a way it never was before.

Suddenly the idea of being her lover, something he always blew off as not what he wanted or what he could have even if he did break down and admit he wanted it, felt like it was just an inch outside of his grasp. Not miles and miles anymore.

The memory of her brown eyes etched with pain and her shoulders slumped in defeat after she accepted the date of another man saddened Spencer but it also gave him courage. He hadn't imagined her behavior toward him over the years. And whereas he could shrug it off before he couldn't now or ever again.

"Maybe I'll let my hair grow out again."

"Oh, I don't know if that would be such a good idea," she teased. "Heather might object."

"She works at my dry cleaners."

Emily chuckled. "Well with our work schedules I guess you gotta meet dates where you can!"

"Yes, that's true. But I don't think her girlfriend would let me take her out on a date."

Emily gave him big eyes. "No, I suppose not. Tough break. Maybe you'll have better luck next time. Hang in there."

"Yeah.....I'm going to do that."

Emily smoothed a strand of hair behind her ear and looked away. Morgan kept smirking. Reid kept longing to touch his new found heart's desire.

And the BAU jet kept carrying all the crime fighters home.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

"So, how was your date?" Reid asked, when Emily had just came into work after the next weekend.

She still had her coat on. "Well, good morning to you too. And does everyone know about my date?"

Morgan chimed in "Pretty much. So did you get lucky?"

Emily gave him a disgusted look.

Morgan laughed and said "I'll take that as a no. Well I'm gonna go get some coffee before the briefing. Whatever you manage to get out of her, Reid, tell me later."

Emily shook her head at Morgan's silliness and then slipped out of her coat. "Ugh, please God no new case today."

"You didn't sleep well?"

"How can you tell? Do I have bags under my eyes. God, I do, right? Great! My cat kept me up all night. I didn't even know a cat could do that. My mother was never an animal lover. Can you believe this is the first time I've ever been a pet owner?"

"I had no idea you own a cat."

"A kitten. Aristotle. Ari for short. I've decided it's the way to go, considering."

"Considering what?"

"Oh you know....our work schedules. I don't have time for more in my life but a cat so on Sunday I bought one and, I have to tell you, I'm glad I did it. Even if I couldn't get much sleep for it crying. I think it misses the pet store. Huh. What does that say about me as cat mommy?" She then started in on her paperwork.

Reid went back to his, working very fast as usual, but now a small smile was on his lips. It seemed that things hadn't gone well with Mick.

And so the small gap that was keeping Reid from being Emily's lover lessened just a little bit more on that morning in the BAU.

XXXXXXXXXXX

"Would you like to join me for lunch?" he asked her.

An eyebrow raised. "Me and you? Who else?"

"No one else."

"Uh, okay!"

A small smile. "Okay."

"So should we go now?"

"It is lunch time so, yeah, now."

"All right. Lets go then."

"All right then."

As they were heading for the elevator they came across Derek. "Prentiss, you going out for lunch? Could you bring me back my usual?"

"Nope. Not today. You're out of luck. Ask Garcia."

"Huh."

But Emily had already walked past him. Reid looked back. "Sorry. We're not going to the diner."

Just the look in Reid's eye-so dark, confident and masculine- was all the indication Derek needed to suspect what was going on between his co-workers, who never had a lunch date before just by themselves. Reid was more likely to spend his lunch hour with JJ, if any woman.

It looked like today was the day when what the young doctor used to do went flying out the window in favor of what he wanted to do from now on.

After Emily and Spencer were on the elevator a big grin came onto Derek's lips. He chuckled. "Go get her, kid," he said to himself before heading off to track down Penelope to see if she would please bring him back some lunch because he had a meeting and he couldn't leave the office that afternoon.


	10. The Long Way Home, final part

**The Long Way Home**

**Emily and Spencer**

**Part Two**

They were waiting for their food to come and she was doing that thing where she stared at him with a dazed look on her face. Spencer used to hate that. Not so much anymore though.

Emily said "So, Reid, what is it you wanted to talk to me about in private? Something about our last case maybe? That was a rough one."

He raised an eyebrow. "Did I say I needed to speak to you about work? I don't recall saying that."

"Well we're here for some reason and I just figured it was work related."

"Nope."

"Oh, well, if its something that has been bothering you lately you can share it with me." She leaned closer.

"I wouldn't say I'm bothered exactly. Actually, I have never felt better. Strange, isn't it? What a change in perspective can do for a person."

"Yeah, um, yeah it is. Its strange." A pause. "What are we talking about again?"

"Do you know why I cut my hair?"

"Your dry cleaner told you to."

"She said it would help me get a date."

"And then you learned she's gay. Sorry about that. It happens sometimes. I dated a gay guy once. Back in college. He came out right after dumping me. Now that was embarrassing but when isn't my dating life embarrassing? Its like one long embarrassing, embarrassment parade. Anyway....you picked the right person to speak to about this. Me and you, Reid, we're kinda in the same boat when it comes to this stuff."

"We are?"

"Compared to the rest of the team, yeah. Look at them. JJ is in a serious, long term relationship. PG same thing. Hotch and Rossi have both been married so obviously they had successes in love even if they later got divorced. And Morgan, well, he dates enough to make up for both mine and your lack of it."

"I guess you're right there. It often feels like everyone does know more about love than I do but I happen to know more than people think."

"I knew you did more on your time off than play chess," she teased.

"Yes, I also read."

Emily laughed. "That was a joke, right?"

"Right."

"Its so hard to tell sometimes."

"I'll work on that."

She gave him a soft smile. "Hmm, this isn't half bad. Me and you...us having lunch alone together...what took us so long?"

"Many things."

She gave him big eyes because the question had been rhetorical but he answered seriously. "Right." She smiled nervously. "Sure."

"So," he said, dragging out the word "there is something I would like to ask you and it didn't felt right to do it in the office or during a case."

"Fire away."

"How do you feel about David Copperfield?"

"Say what?"

"The magician."

"I don't feel anything about him. Why?"

"Because I'd like to invite you to join me at one of his shows."

"He's coming to DC?"

"No. He plays six nights a week in Vegas."

"In Vegas? You want us to go to Vegas to see a magic show?"

"Yes, very much so."

"Why?"

"I think it would be enlightening and enjoyable."

"Enlightening?" she asked saying the word very slowly "And enjoyable?"

"Yeah. Think about it. You can get back to me later with your answer."

Their food arrived. After the server left Emily leaned across the table "So...um....when would we go, if we went, which I'm not saying I would go yet but...uh...when?"

"I'd leave that up to you. Whenever we have the time off. As soon as possible or months from now. Whatever you would be comfortable with would be agreeable to me."

"But I just got a cat."

"Cats can stay home alone for short periods of time. That's what makes them an ideal pet for someone with our work schedules."

"I know that, Reid. Ugh! What I meant is....I just got a cat!"

"What? So a cat equals that you've now resigned yourself to living the rest of your life without companionship."

"Companionship? Who says companionship anymore?"

"I do. Would you prefer I say sex?"

"Ugh!"

Her being flustered he now found adorable when before he only found it confusing and wondered why he kept misreading her- because he used to tell himself the signals she sent were in his imagination and even if they weren't she was wrong to think they would be good together. Now he was starting to believe, more and more each day, that for once the genius of the BAU had been wrong for way too long.

They could be great together. It was at least worth trying and finding out. He wanted to be able to touch her as much as he wanted. And to do that he would have to convince her to open up the heart she had closed.

"You like Atlantic City. Well Vegas is a much better version of Atlantic City and warmer."

"I know what Vegas is like. I still remember the hangover I got there the last time we worked a case out there."

"I remember that case all too well."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought that up."

"Its fine." After a moment he said "Your food is getting cold and we need to finish up so we can get back to the office on time."

"Right, okay." Emily picked up a fry. "So...um...you and me going to Vegas...on some kind of....I take it...date. Wow. That's coming out of left field."

"No, not really. Besides, I think you're entirely too young to get a cat if getting a cat is a euphemism for giving up on ever finding a meaningful relationship."

She gave him a small smile. "Well you're right there. But you're always right about everything so that's no surprise!"

"Not always. There are times I'm way off base."

"Ha. When? You know everything about everything. Its rather annoying, to tell you the truth."

"I don't know much about this kind of thing though but I know enough to get by. At least I've been getting by before now."

She ate her french fry. "Did Morgan rat me out?"

His eyes widened. "If you're asking did he speak to me about the possibility of you and I spending more time together away from work then yes but he never revealed any confidences you may have told him. Did you tell him you'd be interested in that?"

"I told PG. Same thing, really."

"Oh. Yeah. I guess. Well she kept your secret this time, it looks like."

"Good." She ate another fry.

He reached out and stroked his fingers over the top of her hand. "Remember I'm a profiler too. So just like you I don't have to have things told to me to know them. Even when it comes to this, which I know everyone things I'm lost on but I'm just very....slow to realize....not oblivious...and even slower to act. Doesn't mean I can't act if I want to bad enough and this time....I want to."

Her dark eyes watched his finger moving over her skin, as her breathing quickened, and then she turned over her hand and caught his hand in her grasp.

And the gap between them closed completely. "Yeah, okay, lets go to Vegas, Spencer. Sounds fun. I'll beat you in poker again and this time for cold, hard cash."

"Good luck. I've been practicing online. I haven't lost once since our last game."

"Then its gonna sting even more when I break your streak."

He gave her a small smile. "Don't get overconfident. Cockiness can lead to making mistakes."

"You should hope I make a mistake because it's the only shot you have of beating me."

"The odds are in my favor. Being a genius comes in handy sometimes."

"Being a genius didn't help you any last time. I wouldn't count on that."

"You should prepare yourself to take a loss."

"Ha! That's good advice for yourself."

"Emily, I'm not going to let you win just because I'm courting you."

She laughed happily. "Courting me? Reid, you're a ....." They shared a long look before she finished with "good surprise. You kinda pulled a rabbit out of your hat today with asking me to lunch but I like it."

"Did you know that trick's first known origins date back to 1840 in England and was first performed by The Great Gagasti?"

"I seriously doubt anyone but you even knows there ever was a Great Gagasti."

"I'm sure David Copperfield knows. At least he should."

"Good for him."

"I've never been to his show in all the time I lived in Vegas."

"Really? Why not?"

"I don't know."

She laughed. "Well it will be a first for both of us."

"Yep, it will be."

"Wait a minute? You didn't ask anyone else to come to Vegas with us, did you?"

"No. Why would I? Should I?"

"No!"

"Oh. Okay. That's what I assumed."

"Good."

"This was easier than I thought to arrange. I don't know why I stalled on asking you when I first thought of it the other day. Except for that you did have that date with Rawson and I thought it best to see how it turned out."

"Yeah that went like I figured it would. It sucked big time."

"Lets hope that our date can measure higher on your scale than that one did."

"I'm sure it will."

"How can you be sure?"

"Rawson is a jackass and you're....Reid. And that makes all the difference. Now let me eat my fries because they are getting cold and cold fries are gross."

He let go of her hand and sat back. But his eyes stayed on her, lovingly admiring his friend who he was seeing in a whole new way lately. A way that made everything in him that used to be cold warm up for the first time in a long time. It felt like he was going home finally. Not home to Vegas though. To a home he had never known before.

But the only place he wanted to be now.

(_I was so afraid of going under_

_but now the weight of the world feels like nothing._

_No, nothing..._

_-x-x-x-_

_On the way down_

_I saw you_

_and you saved me from myself_

_and I won't forget the way you loved me._

_-x-x-x-x_

_On the way down_

_I almost fell on through_

_but I held on to you) _(Ryan Caberra)

THE END


	11. Had To Be Something, Reid and Em

**Note**-This takes place during season five episode one which was titled Nameless, Faceless. The title of this comes from the song referenced at the end of the fic.

**Had To Be Something To Do With You**

**Spencer Reid and Emily Prentiss**

Her cell rang and she snatched it up quickly. "Morgan? Do you know anything about-"

"We got the unsub. What's going on with Hotch?" Derek asked

She let out a short breath and tried to focus her mind. Staying calm was of the essence right now. Getting frantic would help no one.

Talking fast she filled him in "Foyet got to him. He was stabbed nine times. He made it through surgery but he's not conscious. I'm here with him right now. Listen, I was on the phone with Reid and I heard-"

"I know. He was shot-"

"Is he alive?"

"Yeah, he's gonna be okay. They're putting him in an ambulance now. It was a through and through in his thigh. He saved Dr. Barton from taking a bullet."

Emily swallowed hard.

The day just kept getting worse and worse. She could barely think straight anymore. First Hotch was missing, then she found his apartment looking like a bloody fight took place, then she found out he was knifed and had to undergo surgery and now Reid was shot.

It was the last thing that affected her more than anything else, if she was being honest.

Derek went on "Listen, Prentiss, me and JJ are on our way to you. What hospital is Hotch in?"

After she told him he said "That's where they're taking Reid. We'll be there soon."

"Okay." She disconnected the call. Her breathing was shallow. She could still hear the sound of that gun being fired repeating in her head. She heard that sound so many times in her life but today was the one where it terrified her the most.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Hours later she was standing next to Reid's bed, a few feet back, nervously fidgeting as she watched him laying there knocked out on pain medication.

Derek walked in. "How's he doing?"

"Sleeping like a baby."

Derek shook his head. "I look away for a second and he manages to get into trouble again."

Emily smiled slightly. "It's the nature of the job, I guess." After a moment she said "I should go."

"You don't gotta-"

"No, no, you stay. I need to go get some sleep anyway."

"Ha, you and me both but I'll stick around till the kid wakes up. That way I can tell him to stop causing me so much stress getting into these kind of situations."

"He did talk the unsub down while bleeding from a gun shot wound."

"Yeah. He did good but I could do without him getting shot in the process, know what I'm saying?"

She looked at Reid again. "Yeah, I do." Then she walked out, forcing herself not to look back as she told herself that he was just fine, or at least he would be in time.

Still the fear she felt when she heard that gunshot did not leave her mind for even a moment that day. She lay in bed after a cool shower and tried to sleep but too much had happened. She saw too much, heard too much, knew too much. She couldn't shut off her head.

She wondered if Reid had woken up yet.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

He didn't want to bother her but he also didn't want her to worry. So after Morgan went home Reid decided the most polite thing to do would be to call Emily.

She answered the phone in a very stressed out tone. Only then did he realize her caller ID would say the hospital name because he was using the phone by his bedside.

"Emily Prentiss speaking. Is this about-?"

"Hey, its Reid."

"Oh...hey, Reid. How are you feeling?"

"Like I was shot in my leg."

"Right, right but otherwise you're okay?"

"Yep. I'll just be hobbling around for a while. I look forward to hearing Morgan's gimp jokes."

"Maybe he'll go easy on you."

Reid chuckled.. "I seriously doubt that."

"Wow, you can laugh. You must be all right."

"Are _you _all right?"

"I wasn't shot or stabbed today."

"But you had to go to Hotch's place and walk in on a bloody crime scene and then you had to hear a gun shot go off and not know if I was dead or alive. You haven't had the easiest day either."

"Not one of my finest, no, but I'm fine." She let out a long breath.

"Emily...thank you for visiting me."

"Damn that Morgan. What a big mouth."

Reid smiled. "You could have stuck around until I woke up, you know."

"I didn't want to bother-"

"You wouldn't have bothered me."

"When are they letting you go?"

"The day after tomorrow if there are no post operative complications."

"Need a ride home?"

"Morgan said he'd-"

"Reid," she dragged out his name.

"Oh...sure. That would be nice."

"Okay. Call me after they tell you exactly when you'll be released."

"I will do that."

"Good. Well, try and get some more sleep. You could use it after the last few days."

"Too true...Emily, I hate that you had to hear that gunshot."

"Yeah, well, I've heard and saw worst but that did strike kinda close to home, to tell you the truth."

"I guess we'll have to wait till my leg is healed for that second date."

"Or we could just have dinner at your place or something. That way you don't have to worry about driving or getting around. But its up to you. If you want to wait-"

"Dinner at my place sounds fine."

"Okay," she said happily.

He smiled. "Okay."

"Good night, Reid."

"Bye, Emily." He gently set the phone down with a very tender look on his face. It surprised him, months back, when he realized that Emily was interested in him. It surprised him more when he finally got the courage to ask her out to see a play. But it really surprised him most today when Morgan told him how upset Emily looked as she fretted over Reid's sleeping body at his hospital bed side.

She was worried about him. That touched him so much deeper than just the thought that she found him attractive or wanted to sleep with him. Yes, he liked knowing both those things but somehow her worrying about his health meant even more to him.

Emily Prentiss didn't want to lose him from her life. It made him feel important and special. Something he hadn't felt in a very long time. She was bringing him completely back to life. Waking up parts of him he let go cold when he was hurt and broken by other people in his life.

Now he was looking at life different. Looking at her different. They hadn't even shared a kiss yet but as soon as she took him home from the hospital he planned to change that.

He would kiss her before they got out of the car at his place.

That way he wouldn't have to worry about balancing on crutches. He could thread his fingers in her long, chestnut hair and he could really get lost in their kiss without risking falling over on his ass.

He didn't worry anymore that he couldn't please her. Today, as horrible as it was, made him feel loved. And if she loved him then there was nothing in the world that could bring him down. She had him feeling like Superman.

_(If I go crazy _

_will you still call me Superman?_

_-x-x_

_If I'm alive and well_

_will you be there_

_holding my hand?_

_-x-x_

_I'll keep you by my side_

_with my _

_superhuman might- kryptonite.)_ (Three Doors Down)

**THE END**


	12. Take No More, Reid and JJ

Note- This was written for the Chit Chat on Author's Corner challenge.

**Take No More**

**Reid and JJ**

**April 2012**

"I think I have the last of Henry's stuff packed up," JJ said as she walked into the kitchen "but if you find anything else laying around just send it my way, okay?"

"Sure," he said, in an easy tone of voice that didn't show how this was tearing him up inside. He wanted to ask her not to move out but he didn't feel like he could do that to her.

She was supposed to stay with him six weeks after she got divorced. That turned into more than six months and finally she started to look for apartments. Every one she found she hated until she decided to look for houses. All of them cost too much. Finally with some help from Derek and a push from Penelope, JJ found a fixer upper that Derek said he'd help make all she wanted.

It wasn't that far from Spencer's apartment. But it was eleven minutes away and that was eleven minutes he didn't want between him and JJ, or between him and Henry. Just thinking of not waking up tomorrow to the sound of Henry's excited voice filling up this home made Spencer feel ill.

(_I never knew._

_I never knew that everyone I knew_

_was waiting on a cue_

_to turn and run _

_when all I needed was the truth_) (Over my head by The Fray)

JJ seemed to sense his shift in mood and asked "Tired? Me too." She stretched her back. She was wearing old pink sweat pants and a white t-shirt that said the name of band she loved. It was a mid drift baring one and Reid had to jerk his eyes away when they focused the skin it exposed. He had seen her in many intimate ways since she moved in. They had even made love but that had stopped as suddenly as it started. He didn't say anything about the shift in their relationship.

That was the problem. He never said anything about what he was feeling concerning what she did. He just went along with it.

(_But that's how its gotta be._

_Its coming down to nothing more than apathy._

_I'd rather run the other way _

_than stay and see_

_the smoke and who's standing when it clears_)

He went along with her line "We're best as friends," after their first date, even if he knew that was a lie and he could see she thought so too. Fear kept her from getting with him then.

He went along with her "I'll stay with you for a while, okay?" even though he had a girlfriend who didn't like the idea and ten weeks later dumped him. By then he was spending so much time and energy on his "family" that he barely felt the tear when that relationship ended. If JJ wasn't around Reid would have went into "I'll always be alone," mode and wondered what made it so he couldn't find love but JJ and Henry filled up every moment he wasn't working so he couldn't focus on himself or his ex-girlfriend or if he was even upset it was over.

He went along when JJ slipped into his bed one night, kissing him for the first time in five years, and quickly stripping off her night gown. He kissed her reverently, softly, slowly, till she cried and then joined them together. For once, when making love, he didn't worry about a condom breaking or a pill missed that might create a child who was schizophrenic.

_(And everyone knows_

_I'm in over my head, over my head._

_Eight seconds left in overtime_

_she's on your mind_

_she's on your mind)_

And when they were done that first night he went along with her going back to her own bed in the next room without explaining why it had happened. He went along with only being with her when she was in the mood. They might kiss during the day. They could make love crazy fast against the front door when Henry was at friend's house or school. But still they didn't talk about them afterwards. JJ didn't want to and Spencer never made JJ do a thing she didn't want. No matter how she tore apart his life.

Because she made his life. She made everything better. She made him feel real. And so he let her be a little fucked up. He just let her call the shots and take the lead.

He went along when she stopped initiating sex. Which meant whatever they had was done until and unless she touched him again. He waited and waited for that touch but a part of him knew it was never coming. That part was trying to prepare the rest of him for what was coming for sure. JJ and Henry were moving out later today.

JJ said "I'm gonna go tell Henry we're ready to go. Will you carry the last few boxes out to the van?"

"No problem." No, no problem at all. He'd do whatever she wanted. Even if it damn near killed him.

She offered him a small smile and walked out of the room. He watched her go, feeling numb inside, his genius mind unable to figure her out. They didn't teach about this in any book he read.

(_Lets rearrange._

_I wish you were a stranger I could disengage._

_Say that we agree_

_and then never change._

_Soften a bit_

_till we all just get along_).

The hardest thing Reid had done in years, harder than when he watched JJ marry Will, was when he had to hug Henry and leave him in the new house. He walked out without saying another word to JJ. He didn't slam the door though. He quietly closed it and quietly went to his car and home to the silence to write a letter to his mother.

He lied when he told her about his day. She didn't need to hear this.

_(But that's disregard._

_Find another friend in the discard_

_as you lose the argument in the cable car._

_=x=_

_Hanging above,_

_canyon comes between_

_and everyone knows I'm in over my head,_

_over my head,_

_five seconds left in overtime._

_=x=_

_She's on your mind._

_She's on your mind_.)

XXXXXXXXXX

The months go by and suddenly its been more than three since she slept in his home. Spencer goes to her new house for dinner as many nights as he's in town. Henry was withdrawn for a couple of weeks but he's back to normal now. Kids are resilient. They bounce back. But the cuts makes scars and no matter what Spencer knows that the divorce and moving from house to house has affected little Henry.

One night Derek and Penelope have come over for dinner. She's pregnant now and glowing. Everyone is laughing and happy. Spencer feels like he is far away from the scene though. Looking down at himself and his friends.

Inside he isn't happy. He knows he should start dating again and quit waiting for JJ to touch him, give him a look, kiss him and silently tell him that tonight he is her whole world.

There's a knock on the door. Derek offers to get it but instead JJ goes. They can all hear her talking. Its some guy who she's gone on a date with who just dropped by. Her voice is strained. "Its not a good time. I'm sorry."

When she comes back Spencer tries to force a smile but its too much. The dam bursts. Even as he thinks of little Henry and how this could mean he can't see him as much he can't stop himself.

JJ fakes a smiles and says "Sorry, guys, where were we?"

"I can't do this anymore," Spencer says before standing and storming out. He goes to Henry's room. "Hey, I just came to say good night."

"Stay! We can play catch!"

"Uncle Derek likes to play catch. Ask him. I need to get home. Good night. Sleep tight."

"Don't let the bed bugs bite," JJ said from the door way, trying to smile even if her eyes were filled with worries.

Spencer turned and walked out.

(_And without a sound_

_we lose sight of the ground in the throw around_

_Never thought you wanted to bring me down_

_We won't let it go down_

_till we torch it ourselves_)

JJ followed him onto the front lawn. "Spence! What is your problem, huh?"

"You are my problem! The games you play are my problem! You're dating? Really, JJ? Really? Is that why you moved out? So you could fuck without me knowing about it?"

"Don't talk to me like that!"

"I'll talk to you however I want. You haven't even heard the start of what I have to say to you but I won't say it now when Henry may hear. So count yourself lucky that I have self control. But don't think this is done because its far from it. You will hear everything I have to say about the way you have jerked me around since the day we met and how I will never let you do this to me again. I will never let you think you have me to fall back on again."

He started to leave but she grabbed his arm. "Please, Spence! Please, stay. Don't leave like this. Talk to me. I didn't mean to hurt you. I just didn't think you were in love with me because you never said you were. You never said anything! What was I supposed to think? I just wanted you to say _I love you. Please don't move out. You belong here. Henry belongs here. We're a family_. But you didn't say it!"

"That's a lie. You didn't want me to say that because you are scared to death to love me. Well, JJ, I'm sorry to have to inform you that you do love me and you will regret that you did this. You'll regret every day you've cheated us out of and you'll regret it long past when you think right now you'll be over this. Because that's how it works when you throw away the man who has loved you the longest and best. Now let go of me cause I am leaving and I'm not going to look back. I will visit Henry and maybe you and I will one day be best friends again but us...that is done. Like you decided when you went on that date."

"It was a mistake!" Tears stream from her eyes. "One stupid mistake!"

"One mistake. I can name a thousand ways you've thrown me away. I can't take it anymore. I love you but I can't take this."

_(Everyone knows she's on your mind._

_Everyone knows I'm in over my head_

_I'm in over my head._

_I'm in over my head_.)

He's ready to walk away. His mind is made up. He'll never kiss his JJ again...the girl/woman who never really was his at all, no matter how much he ached to believe otherwise.

But then she running her hands over his chest, down his arms, clutching his hands and all the while she is begging "Spence, please, please, please, don't do this. I'll change. Just stay. I was just scared. This is so big and I need you so much. Please! I ruin everything. Don't let me ruin this. Don't tell me you're done. Please, Spence! I do love you and you know I do. I need you. Henry needs you. Your family needs you." And she's crying. She's a mess and he can't stand it so he kisses her, taking control in a way he never did before but a way he knows he will in the future.

And finally he becomes a man completely. From then on they talk honestly and when he's pissed he tells her instead of keeping it inside and when she's scared she takes deep breaths and remembers not to sabotage her life. So she can keep her soulmate and they can be a family.

Its tricky sometimes. But they both stay this time. And there's no more dates for either of them- except with each other.

_(With eight seconds left in overtime_

_she's on your mind_

_She's on your mind_.)

THE END


	13. Roomies, part one, Reid and Emily

**Note-** I haven't written about this pairing in a few months so I thought I'd delve into them again. This story takes place during season five episode twenty one, which was titled Exit Wounds.

**Roomies**

**Emily and Reid**

**Part One **

**May 2010**

"I'm not sleeping with Reid!" Morgan announced, making it sound like a fate worth than death.

Nobody had to ask why. They all knew Reid was on this weird microbiotic diet thing that consisted of a lot of beans. Though he had gotten pills to cut down on the side effect of passing gas Morgan wouldn't let go the one night they had shared a hotel room before Reid had bought any medication.

Part of the teasing relationship the two men had insured that Morgan would be bringing up that night for months to come.

Before she could stop herself Emily blurted out "I'll bunk with Reid."

Hotch said "That's settled then. Lets get upstairs and try to get a few good hours of rest before we hit everything fresh at eight am."

They were stuck at a inn in Alaska that had only four spare rooms for their team of seven. That meant that six of them had to share and one person got a single. Though Emily would usually share with JJ, tonight JJ had been complaining of having a sore throat and fever. Emily couldn't afford to get sick while working a case and have two members of the team at less than par.

Besides how many chances in all her life would she have an excuse to share a room with Reid? It was too good of an opportunity to pass up.

As the team members started to head upstairs Emily stood up, from her seat on the couch, and looked over at Reid. "Looks like we're roomies tonight."

He gave her a wide eyed, pursed lip look. "Looks like it."

For a moment they were distracted by Morgan and Garcia flirting, with Morgan trying to order her to work upstairs in their room but her telling him that his gorgeous chocolate body would be too much of a distraction. They threw back and forth flirty lines until Morgan gave in and lumbered upstairs, giving her a stern look and telling her to finish up quick cause she needed sleep like the rest of them. Garcia called after him "Oh, mon cher, you should know by now that I never sleep well because you haunt my every moment in dream land. But I don't hardly mind because the things we do in my dreams I would not miss for all the world."

Morgan laughed and headed upstairs.

Emily looked at Reid, before motioning with her hand, "After you."

He walked past her and toward the staircase. Penelope and Emily shared a look before Emily followed Reid.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Reid made it two steps inside the room, flipped on the light, and then stopped dead in his tracks, causing Emily to run into the back of him.

"Ompf! REID!"

He moved to the side. "Sorry."

She rubbed her nose. "Little warning next time."

He looked over at the bed. "There's just one bed."

She shrugged. "Its an inn. What did you expect?"

"Two beds," he said, in a tone that was laced with frustration.

Emily smirked. "Well, you got it half right." She set her bag on the small dresser and opened it, pulling out her pajamas. "I don't know about you but I'm beat so I'm gonna grab a five minute shower and then hit the sack." She raised an eyebrow at him. "You don't plan to read half the night, do you?"

"I only brought two books. If I wanted to read them both tonight I could finish before you're done in the bathroom."

"Not everything is better with speed," she flirted with him, though she was sure he had no clue what she was doing.

He never seemed to notice all her attempts to garner his sexual interest in her. She had just about given up on him, since she wasn't going to push him against a wall and just kiss the dickens out of him, and he seemed to not do subtle. They were at an impasse. She had to move on.

That is where Mick came in. But she just couldn't seem to pull the trigger and go for it with the hottie Brit. She blamed it on his arrogant attitude or her work schedule but the truth was that Emily knew that if she gave in and dated him all that would happen is when she closed her eyes and kissed Mick she would imagine he was Reid. It had happened a few times before to her. Reid was great for her fantasy life. A great inspiration for her orgasms. But just having him in her mind wasn't enough anymore.

So she had to give up on the idea of them. Of course, now that she had herself convinced to do that she had went and volunteered to share a bed with him in a drafty inn. Smart move.

Maybe she'd have a sex dream about him and wake him up because she was moaning his name. That would seal the deal on her embarrassment where he is concerned. But at least it would be obvious what she wanted then.

Cause it sure as hell wasn't now. That much she knew for sure.

XXXXXXXXX

Emily came out of the bathroom to find Reid on his cell. "You do know its six am back in Virginia, right?"

"I gotta go," Reid said into the phone before disconnecting the call. "It was just Morgan."

"Didn't get enough of him during the day, huh?"

"Something like that."

Emily smirked. "Okay, well, scoot over cause I'm coming in."

"I'll take the floor."

"No, you won't. Trust me. My bare feet are on this floor and its freezing. Now scoot!" She slid onto the bed.

For a moment there was a long uncomfortable silence between them. Emily pretended not to notice as she lay down on her side facing away from him.

"Silk pajamas, huh?" Reid asked.

"Let me guess, statistics show that women who sleep in silk pajamas have less sex than women who sleep in babydoll nighties."

"Baby doll? Is that really what they call them?"

Emily rolled her eyes. "Night, Reid."

He got up, took out his clothes and went to the bathroom to change. When he came out he hesitated for a long moment before he walked around the bed again and crawled in behind Emily. "Good night, Prentiss. Sorry you drew the short straw and have to share with me tonight."

Rolling over she looked at him, as he lay on his back. "Well I'm not. Now I'm on the list of women who have gotten to share a bed with you. I consider myself pretty special. JJ and Garcia are gonna be so jealous."

He smirked. "I just bet."

"I have to warn you, though, that I'm like an octopus when I sleep. So if I get all tangled around you, sorry about that in advance."

He swallowed hard. "You're forgiven, in advance."

"JJ hates it when I toss and turn and end up sleeping half on her sometimes. I've been known to wake up on the other end of the bed some mornings."

"You may have a light form of somnabilism."

"Huh?"

"Sleep walking."

"Luckily I don't think I ever get out of bed. I just move around the whole bed."

"Are you sure you don't want me to take the floor?"

"Reid, don't start that again. I'm sure we can manage for one night, right?"

"I...suppose...we'll have to."

"Way to be a trooper!"she said, in an offended tone. He made the idea of sleeping next to her sound as much fun as Chinese water torture. Emily flopped on her back.

"Its just that...I've never shared a bed with someone I'm not...involved with. Except Morgan. But that's not really the same. I mean...I guess it's the same. Morgan is my co-worker and you're my co-worker."

"And I have girly parts and Morgan doesn't," Emily teased Reid, lightening up considerably because of his discomfort.

"There is that. Not that it should really matter and it doesn't. I don't see you that way."

Giving him a probing look she said "Yeah, I've noticed that. Thanks a lot, by the way!"

"You're welcome."

"So its well established that you don't see me that way but I know that guys think about sex nearly constantly so who is it that's running through your mind these days? Austin?"

"Its been over for months with her."

"Yeah, I know but still...someone has to be in that big brain of yours so who is it? Some famous actress or singer? The barista at the coffee shop? JJ? Garcia? Who?"

"I don't think this is an appropriate topic to discuss right now...or ever...but especially right now."

"Why not? This is pillow talk." She smiled at him and patted her pillow. "Come on, you can tell me. Your secret is safe with me."

He gave her a long look. "You promise not to tell anyone?"

"Yeah." She really wondered who was the woman who got this man hot. She licked her lips as she waited for his response. Her heart sped up.

He answered "Hotch."

Her mouth dropped. "What?"

"Are you surprised?"

"I just...expected...a different answer, that's all."

He chuckled. "If you could see your face right now. I'm just kidding with you but the fact that you bought it does disturb me a little. I know I'm not the most alpha guy around but still."

Emily smacked his chest. "Reid! That's not funny!" Her hand rested on his chest. She realized she was incredibly close to him at that moment.

Their eyes locked. She didn't stop to think because she knew even the slightest pause would be enough time for her to talk herself out of what she wanted to do most. Leaning over she pressed her lips to his.


	14. Roomies, part two, Reid and Emily

**Roomies**

**Emily and Reid**

**Part Two **

**May 2010**

They were stuck at an inn in Alaska that didn't have enough available rooms for all the BAU teammates to have their own quarters so Reid and Prentiss had to double up. It was her idea.

From the moment she suggested it, he had concerns about sharing his bed with his beautiful co-worker. Though Emily Prentiss was just a friend of his, like the rest of the team, there was no denying she was incredibly attractive and the only unattached woman on the team.

Reid worried his body would overrule his good intentioned mind. That he would have a physical reaction to her nearness. One that would embarrass him and make working together awkward in the future.

He was just a man after all. Some things he couldn't control no matter how hard he tried. He didn't want to get a hard on and have Emily think he's a pervert.

Reid realized the moment that her lips touched his that he had been worrying for nothing. She was the one who leaned in and kissed him, as much as that shocked him. She crossed that line of friendship that he had always assumed was very firmly in place between them.

At first the feel of her lips against his was soft and tentative. He raised his hands, cupped her head, and deepened the kiss. Her hands roamed all over his chest, which was covered by his t-shirt.

He pushed her on her back and in one smooth move hiked her leg up so he was intimately pressed against her, as their kisses went on and on, every second leaving friendship further and further behind.

She urged him out of his clothes, her fingers and mouth eager to caress and taste every part of him. Her want for him seemed voracious. It fed his new found want of her. Every time she nipped at him, caressed him, panted breathlessly and encouraged his kisses and caresses he was spurred on to take them further.

He didn't stop to wonder if this would cause them problems tommorow. Spencer Reid was a man who was having a phenomenal sexual experience. That was all that was on his mind right then.

And how damn right it felt to be buried deep inside of Emily.

XXXXXXXXXXX

She lay there breathing heavily. She could hardly wrap her mind around the fact that she just had sex with Reid.

Emily turned her head and met his eyes. He gave her a look that was unreadable. Feeling very vulnerable she jerked the sheet around her, grabbed her clothes and hurried to the bathroom. Once inside she used the bathroom, washed up, got re-dressed and then stared at herself in the mirror, fingering the marks that Reid had left on her that would darken overnight and be bruises by morning.

Once she felt calmer she let out a long breath and headed back into the room. Running her hand through her hair she said "So lets not be weird about this or anything..."

"Right. I agree. We wouldn't want weirdness."

"Right!" She gingerly got back into the bed. "This kind of stuff happens sometimes."

"It does?"

"Sure!"

"Hmmm. Not to me. This kind of thing, sharing a bed with someone who is a friend and then engaging in coitus, has most certainly never happened to me before and, I have to admit, I'm not sure what happens next after situations like this."

"Nothing happens, Reid, okay? The two people go to sleep and that's it. It's a one off."

"Good night then," he said, stiffly.

"Yeah, night," she muttered before laying down, feeling close to tears. He flipped off the light and they both stayed quiet after that.

Emily had fallen into a fitful sleep when she woke up because of screaming. Sleepily she asked "What is that?"

She realized her head was resting on Reid's chest, and it felt just right. Reluctantly she moved back.

He was half asleep too. "Huh? What's what?"

The screaming came again.

Emily said "Get up! I think that's Garcia!"

Just then they heard a door fly open down the hall and heavy footsteps thud over the stairs. Emily and Reid rushed to get dressed, with their backs turned to each other, and then ran outside to see what the commotion was.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Another long day of investigating and finally they were back in their room again. Reid and Emily never had a moment to talk privately all day. At dinner her mind had been filled with questions about what would happen tonight.

When they got back to the room Reid said "I'm sorry that you're stuck in here for another night. I did ask Morgan to double up with me but he feels Garcia needs him right now."

"JJ is still not one hundred percent so there's no way I'm going over to her room. I can go see if Hotch or Rossi will share with me and the other can share with you, though. Problem solved."

She went to leave the room but he pinned her against the door. His chest was pressed to her back, his hand on the door kept it closed. "I'd rather you didn't."

"Why's that?"

"We should discuss what happened and clear the air."

"Sorry that will have to be saved for another day. I've had a long day and all I want is a bath and the bed." She jerked on the door but he didn't move so she couldn't open it. "Reid, come on!"

"Emily, we can be adults about this-"

"Ha! I can. I don't know about you. Seems to me you're throwing a tantrum and you don't want me to be in bed with someone else tonight. Well, guess what? Its not your call. You don't get a vote."

He moved away from her. "Fine but I thought we agreed things wouldn't be weird. That didn't last long, did it?"

She spun around and pushed at his chest. "Of course things will be weird. WE HAD SEX!"

"A little louder. They didn't hear you back in Quantico."

"I don't give a damn who hears me."

"Good. That answers one question for me then."

Her eyes were filled with fire as she glared at him. "Way to be cryptic!"

"The question was if you would be embarrassed for people to know we had sex."

"Why would I be?"

"You would be if you regretted it and wished it never happened. If you only wanted to forget it. Those were other questions I had."

She let in and out a ragged breath. Running her fingers through her hair she turned away from him. "I couldn't forget it even if I wanted to but I don't. Of course I don't. Who would want to forget a fantastic time like that? But I get its not happening again and that's cool. Consider it a mutual decision." She moved to her bag, got out her pajamas and bath products and went into the bathroom without looking at him again.

An hour later she came out and found Reid on the phone with Morgan, just like the night before. He quickly hung up.

She asked "Are you attached at the hip to that man?" in a teasing tone, although it was tinged with sadness.

"I don't know why I ask his advice when its clear he can't make his own love life work and his advice for me rarely is helpful."

"Maybe you are a glutton for punishment. I've often thought I am. Even when I know something is hopeless I can hang onto it like a dog with a bone. Not that its ever gotten me anywhere. I should just let it go at the first sign its gonna be another useless detour in my life."

"Wow, I've never heard myself described in quite that glowing way before."

"I didn't say I was talking about-"

"But you are."

"I'm talking about me." She sat on the bed, looking into his eyes, eyes she could so easily get lost in. "What happened last night happened because I wanted it to. I initiated it and I kept pushing for us to go farther. I decided we'd have sex. I take full responsibility for what went down."

"That's funny cause I distinctly remember that I was right there with you deciding every step of the way."

"You were probably just too polite to push me away," she said, in a half joking way as she began to pull back the sheet and comforter.

"You know that's not true. You felt how much I wanted you."

"A purely physical reaction to the situation. Perfectly normal. Don't blame yourself for it. It happened. Its over. Lets just get past it." She lay down. "Night." A light sheen of tears sprang to her eyes.

He turned off the light and spooned her. "Do you mind?"

Barely breathing, as she felt his warmth against her back, she whispered "No."

He tightened his hold on her. "That answers another question of mine." Reid lay a kiss against the back of her neck. "I'm not the type of man who will sleep with a woman just one time to release some tension, if no feelings are involved, and I don't think you are that type of woman."

"Ha! You'd be surprised."

"Don't force me to profile you to obtain the truth."

She sniffled a little and then smirked, settling back into his arms. "Give it your best shot."

"Your mannerisms suggest that you do desire a more substantial relationship with me or, at the least, to see where this could lead but your words proclaim the opposite in an attempt to protect yourself from looking foolish should I not desire the same thing back."

"Did Morgan tell you that?"

"He told me to go get some whip cream out of the kitchen downstairs."

Emily let out a loud laugh. "How PG puts up with him I will never know!"

"She suggested I get chocolate sauce too."

Emily chuckled. "They do think alike."

"Yep."

She felt his arousal pressing against her butt. "So talking about them gets you hot? Good to know!"

His hand cupped her breast. "More like you in my arms does that. You know how beautiful you are."

"Well it's a good sign that you think I'm beautiful after seeing me naked. Before I was just that chick with a glock to you, huh?"

"I didn't look at you that way because I respect you. You're my co-worker and I saw you as a capable team member. You have my apology for not properly objectifying you."

She laughed and twisted around in his arms. "Don't let it happen again."

Then they started kissing and soon they were making love, both not knowing what the future would hold for them but knowing that it all felt right they stopped thinking so much and just let their wants and needs take over.

Emily would love to be Reid's roommate more often during their cases. Even if she didn't get much sleep her life sure got a lot more interesting whenever they were sharing a bed.

THE END


	15. Milestone, Reid and Emily

Note- The place Reid suggests going in this fic actually exists in Washington DC, though it is a once in a while kind of event. This story is inspired by the fact that I read on Chit Chat for Author's Corner that Reid's birthday is just a few days before Emily's.

**Milestone**

**Emily Prentiss and Spencer Reid**

**October 2010**

"I bet you're glad the case wrapped up today," Reid said to Prentiss as they gathered their files in the police station. "So you can celebrate

your-"

"Ugh, you too, really?"

"What?"

"Everyone has asked me how I'm celebrating and tried to make plans with me. I'll tell you what I told them: I'm not doing anything for my birthday and that is final."

"Oh." He bit back the words_ I'm sorry _because he knew she did not like anyone having pity for her and would not like him to emphasize that she was reacting badly to turning forty. "Would you celebrate my birthday with me even if you're not celebrating yours? The team dinner the other night was nice but, yeah, I'd actually like to see this Midnight Magic Show at Mead Theater tommorow night."

She gave him a surprised look. They had never gone anyplace with just the two of them before. "Just me and you?"

"Well Morgan doesn't really like magic and he said that the last time he went with me was his last time ever wasting money on a magic show. And Garcia, I think, would be busy with Lynch, at midnight, and Hotch would be with Jack and JJ with Will and Henry and Rossi...well I don't know if he has plans...should I ask him?"

"No, no, that's okay. Just you and me sounds fine."

A bright smile curved over his lips and he started to ramble about how wonderful the show would be and then the history of magic until Emily rolled her eyes at him, shook her head and walked away, a small smile playing on her lips also.

XXXXXXXXXXX

"Hey, Emily," Reid said into his cell phone, while he sitting at his kitchen table reading the newspaper the next day "what do you think about Korean bar-be-cue for dinner tonight?"

"Dinner?"

"Yeah, there is a new place that opened near the theater and the review makes it sound amazing. Did you know they cook the food right at your table? I want to try Chadolbegi. Its thin strips of beef brisket."

"I know. Though I haven't had it in years."

"I was thinking we could go to dinner before the show."

"Yeah," she teased "I picked up on that."

"So would that be okay? Remember I am the birthday boy and it would be rather rude to turn me down."

She chuckled. "Well in that case then all right but you're making me reconsider celebrating my birthday today if the birthday girl would get to make demands and not be able to be turned down. Be careful because you don't know what I may insist on."

"Anything you want, Emily."

She smirked. "Watch it, Reid. You don't want to go there," she joked.

"There? Where? I'll go wherever you want."

"Handsome, don't write a check your ass can't cash," she joked. "I'll see you tonight. Around 9?"

"We'll have to drive because the trains will stop running by the time the show is over."

"I'll pick you up then."

"Good because my car has been making some odd noises lately."

"How much longer are you gonna hang onto that old thing?"

"It's a classic. Besides I don't drive that much but when I do its like we're in it together. I couldn't get that with some random new car. It still has some life left in it."

"If you say so, Reid. If you say so. See you tonight."

"I can hardly wait...I mean..."

"Me too." Click.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

A sizzling tension flared between them during dinner, stronger than the brief, rare flickers she'd felt before. Almost strong enough for her to be convinced he must be feeling it too but who could ever tell with a mysterious man like Spencer Reid?

Emily had been dreading her birthday but there she was, on the actual night itself, sitting across from her friend and co-worker smiling, laughing, conversing about a wide range of topics that most other men could care less about. She hated small talk but when she was with her friends it wasn't boring getting to know you, how is the weather, do you follow politics and sports chit chat. Reid made her feel comfortable and yet slightly off balance too.

By the time they were walking from the theater, after the show, to her car she was in such a good mood, chuckling over his excitement about the magic tricks that they had just seen, that she said "Too bad this wasn't a date. I haven't had such a decent time with a guy in years."

His eyebrows shot up. "Decent? Don't be afraid to overwhelm me with praise. Trust me I can handle it."

She laughed. "You know what I mean. This has been nice."

"Yeah," he mused "it has been. Is it too late to retroactivity make this a date? That way I could say I had an awesome date on my birthday."

"Technically this is just your birthday celebration. Its my actual birthday. Thank you for forcing me to celebrate it."

"Forty is a milestone-"

"UGH!"

"Instead of dreading the number you could embrace-"

"Ugh, ugh, ugh, of course you say that. You're a _toddler_."

"Actually, I'm far from a child. I just turned 29 and I plan to embrace my thirtieth birthday and fortieth and fiftieth. I do understand how a birthday can make you rethink your life but, Emily, you are someone I admire very much and I hate to think you would think your life hasn't been meaningful. You're meaningful to me and you make my life more meaningful. Just look at tonight? I know you were kidding before about wishing it was a date but...tonight showed me what a good date could feel like and it made me think that maybe I shouldn't give up on finding someone to have good dates with. You did that for me. I'm glad for everyday of your life."

Titling her head to the side, standing there on the street in downtown DC, she gave him an look filled with wonder and amazement. "I shouldn't have called you a kid. The truth is that you're the most impressive man I ever met. I hope you find her, Reid. I really do."

With a tender look in his eye he told her "Maybe I already have."

She blinked several times, surprise lighting her dark eyes before she smiled, glancing down shyly. "Whoa there, tiger," she joked, moving to open the car door "this is the big leagues." She looked up and into his eyes. "You think you're up to the challenge?"

The way she said it was with just enough teasing that they could easily laugh it off, moving on as if it didn't mean a thing at all.

Nodding, with an eager look in his eye but trying not to smile, he cleared his throat and then said "Yeah."

She chuckled and turned to get in the car. "Yeah, okay," she said, trying to laugh off the moment, nervous to go any farther right then, wondering if Monday at work it would just be like normal again.

Emily gasped when Spencer spun her around, slid his fingers into her hair, titled her head back and brought his lips down on hers. The kiss was insistent at first, as if trying to prove something, but then lessened, gently caressing her until she was whimpering when he broke contact.

She felt dazed and stunned. "Happy...birthday...to...me."

"Happy birthday, Emily," he said, tenderly, not moving back from her, his fingers stroking over her jaw in a feather light stroke.

"Can I demand something since its my birthday and all?"

"Go for it."

"Take me out again."

A deep smile came to his lips. "Hey, I was going to ask you that!" he teased. "You stole my thunder."

Smiling deeply she brought her arms up to loop around his neck, pulling him down towards her, "You're not dealing with the most patient woman on earth, let that be a lesson for you." As their lips joined again in a more heated kiss they started to explore that simmering, sizzling tension between them that had gone ignored for way too long.

It was a birthday to remember for sure.

THE END


	16. Now You See Me, Reid and Emily

**Note-** _This is a pinch hit for Chit Chat on Author's Corner's March Madness Challenge. My couple was Reid/Prentiss and the prompt was Land of the Lost._

_Make sure you stop by Chit Chat on Author's Corner in the upcoming weeks because they are getting started with their nominations for fan fic awards. They need everyone to pitch in and nominate so that the most deserving stories get recognized. If you don't know where to find Chit Chat on Author's Corner then PM me._

**Now You See Me**

**Reid and Prentiss**

**July 2011**

She made him feel like he could do anything. Like he was normal. As bad as it sounds, before he met her Reid had never felt like that.

Though Emily Prentiss probably didn't know the effect she had on Dr. Spencer Reid, it was true that she had made him a better man. Just because when she looked at him she saw a man- not the little boy with a genius brain that a lot of other people saw.

For three months and twenty seven days he had believed her dead. The only way he knew to honor her memory had been not to lose himself in grief but to live an even bolder, better, happier life. To joke and laugh more. To love deeper. To appreciate his friends and family and every second he had with them.

Every second they were safe and alive while Reid thought Emily was gone from this world. Lost from this life. That her hopes and dreams were dead. That their chances had all withered up.

Now, as he sits on the jet with his other team members as they head to Europe to bring her home, Reid can't help but remember the first time Emily made him feel like an average guy.

"_So," she asked, dragging out the word, as she sat across from him in the break room during the first week she was working at the BAU "are you seeing anyone?"_

_He choked on his coffee. Quickly wiping at his mouth with a napkin, he asked, his voice squeaking some, "Me? Am I seeing someone? How do you mean?"_

"_Oh, I'm sorry. I'm prying. Its just I noticed her flirting with you."_

_He looked all around. "Who?"_

"_Come on, Reid, you don't need to play it off for me. I'm sure you noticed Agent Greene hitting on you when she was getting her coffee."_

"_She was?"_

"_She was giving you signals left and right. If you're single and interested you should ask her to dinner because I guarantee she'd jump all over the chance."_

"_She would? What makes you say that?"_

"_You didn't notice her giving you eyes? Touching your arm? Laughing a little too loud at your jokes? Titling her head to the side to listen intently to every word you said? Tossing her hair over her shoulder?"_

_He blinked a few times. "No."_

_She chuckled. "God, you men drive me crazy. I would think a trained profiler would catch a signal when its being broadcast with neon lights but I guess profilers are just men underneath it all." She shrugged. "So are you going to ask her out?"_

"_No, I don't think so. I'm not so great at dating."_

"_Join the club. Who is?" And then she gave him a sweet smile, grabbed her coffee cup and walked off._

He had sat there not thinking at all about Agent Miranda Greene but instead about how Prentiss didn't see him as some geek who couldn't get a date or some kid that no grown woman would waste her time on. It was a small thing but it mattered to Reid. And in the years to come he would learn that Emily, even when she was trying to protect him, saw him as her equal and not the baby of the BAU.

For that, he loved her, even before he fell in love with her. Just as he had been starting to realize his deeper feelings for her she got wrapped up in the Ian Doyle case that eventually took her from them all. Reid had thought she was gone from this world and all he could do was honor her memory by living his life to the fullest.

But he had been wrong...he had been lied to. Emily wasn't gone. And now he was going to Europe to bring her home.

Maybe she would never return his feelings of adoration, aching want and desperate need but he knew she would be the friend he had always relied on. And that would be enough for him.

Just to see her again and see that she was all right. Just to know the one person who saw him as the man he wanted to be was still here on earth, that would satisfy him. He smiled as he stared out the window of the jet, looking at the colors of the sky as the sunset upon their descent into Paris.

The jet was filled with a quiet tension that, at any moment, felt like it could explode. Anger, hurt, shock and pain filled the members of the team who had been kept in the dark about Emily still being alive.

At first Reid had felt all that too but as every second passed he was filled more and more with the feeling of gratitude that he hadn't lost his last chance to ever see her, hold her, talk to her, look into her lovely eyes, laugh with Emily.

When, hours later, he finally saw her face-to-face again there were no words he could find to say that would explain how much she meant to him so he settled for choking out "I missed you," in a tone that probably did sound like a little boy.

But he knew that Emily knew he was all man now. And what she thought was what counted most to him.

They fell into each other's arms, hugging tightly, the same way she had hugged Garcia, like they never wanted to let go. She had come back to them. She wasn't lost for this lifetime.

Spencer Reid wasn't sure he believed in miracles but holding her on that warm summer day sure felt like one.

THE END


	17. You Could Be Happy, Reid and Emily

**Note-** _I agreed to write a one shot about this pair to help advertise the Profiler's Choice Awards. The nomination period ends in just a couple of weeks. If you haven't got your nominations in could you please head over to Chit Chat on Author's Corner and do so soon. _

_The mods are working hard to make the awards a success but they need your help. To find Chit Chat on Author's Corner, click on Discussion Forums in the right hand corner of the story index page._

_About this one shot, the title comes from a Snow Patrol song._

**You Could Be Happy**

**Reid and Emily**

Unhappy people want the whole world to be unhappy with them. Happy people just want to make everyone else smile.

He's been both. Today he is definitively more of one than the other. The category he falls into surprises him as much as how he got there.

Things can never go back to the way they were before Ian Doyle came into their lives, Dr. Spencer Reid knows this to be an undeniable fact as true as the laws of gravity and motion. Reid now knows just how much he can hate a person, even a dead person.

He can hate to a level so deep and demented that it scares him. To hate someone that much is powerful. To feel that deeply, changes a man at his core.

Everything in the last year has changed this man until he feels like he barely resemblances who he used to be. Not just Ian Doyle. Emily played a big part in changing Reid too. But he can't blame it all on her. It's everything- Hotch, JJ, Morgan, Garcia, his mother, all these secret keepers who do it for his own good, the headaches, the lies and betrayals, the constant stream of ever worsening unsubs, the people he have met, the lessons he has learned about himself and this world.

It's easy to break a heart, easy also to shatter any semblance of a peaceful life. In a blink of an eye it could happen. But it's exponentially harder to heal a heart or piece back together a shattered life- if it can be done at all.

Sometimes a person simply can not be salvaged. Sometimes when a man breaks, he breaks for good. When he shatters, he shatters forever. There have been times that Reid thought that would turn out to be his fate and the fate of their friendship.

Now he isn't so sure of anything anymore because he's here with her on a sunny day in a park surrounded by happy people, kicking a soccer ball around, laughing, trying...and he can almost forgot for a second that he ever hated her at all, ever was broken, ever was shattered.

He can think about the future and always feeling like this.

As he shows Declan how soccer uses science, Emily stares at him with that baffled stare of hers- like he isn't quite human. By now he's learned to be flattered by it instead of offended.

When it's time to take Declan home they walk him a couple blocks to his house and he hugs her as they say good bye. Considering his parents, the childhood he has had, the scars he carries, he comes across as a loving kid who wants most of all to know that Emily won't disappear on him another time. His mother, his father, his nanny, they all went away.

Emily even went away for months. Now that she is back home she has been trying for the last six months to reassure Declan that she won't do that to him ever again.

This is the first time that Emily has talked Reid into going to hang out with her when she sees Declan. Not that it took much talking into at all.

They have been spending a lot more time together in the last couple of months.

He's had his moments when he hasn't wanted to forgive her, trust her again, risk getting close but every day the pain slips further away and he starts to let himself feel his love for her again. The love he used to want to surgically remove from himself if only such a procedure existed.

As they get into her SUV she tells Reid "You're so good with him. You should have your own kids someday."

"You've told me that thirty one times in the five years, five months and nineteen days you have known me."

"What? No I haven't. You're exaggerating."

"Morgan is an exaggerator. I'm quite literal and my memory rarely fails me so I assure you that it has been thirty one times."

"I guess I just think you'd make a great dad."

Casting one last glance at the house, Emily starts the vehicle and pulls out of the driveway. After a few moments of driving Reid tells her "Thank you for today. It meant a lot to me."

"Aw, you don't have to thank me. It should be the other way around...It meant a lot to me too."

They drive in silence for several minutes until Reid decides that life is not meant to be lived being safe. It's meant to be lived being slightly nervous that you're going to lose everything wonderful you have but not letting that stop you from having and enjoying, as much as possible, those wonderful things, people, times that you share.

"You know," he tells her "there is one way that you could finally find out if I'd make a the kind of father you think that I would. Solve your hypothesis."

The look he gives her tells her what he is getting at and her eyes widen in shock before she warns "Don't make me crash this car."

They both know there is something there between them. But they skirt around it always. Reid is sick of being the kind of man who skirts around things.

"You would make a good mom, Emily."

Neither of them want something fleeting- just a fling to get the other one out of their systems. Neither of them can handling losing again. They need a win. They need something steady. Something that thrusts them into the happy category for good instead of just for a few hours in a park with an orphan boy who needs them as much as they need him.

Emily argues with Reid, in a kind of defeated tone, "It's too late for me now."

"You're asking the wrong question. You're asking_ Have I waited too long_? That question means your attention is focused on your past. What you should be asking is_ What do I want for my future and how am I going to get it?_ Our pasts can eat us alive, metaphorically speaking, if we allow them too but our future...our future, Emily...it can be anything we want it to be. But we only get somewhere closer to there once we stop pretending that what is between us doesn't mean what we both know it means."

She is staring at him so much she is barely glancing back at the road and Reid thinks she just might get them both killed- or at least gravelly injured- in a car accident but he can't say that because if he changes the subject now, when they are right on the edge of getting somewhere, they may never get back to this again. They are both too good at staying in their own safe, small worlds day after lonely day, night after sleepless night.

He's sick of feeling so much for her but not saying it. Sick of her staring at him like he's everything she wants but not touching him. Sick of her comments about the future he should have when he knows he doesn't want a future with anyone else but her.

Suddenly she jerks the car over to the shoulder of the road, turns to him and says "You almost just got us killed!"

"You're driving so if anyone almost got us killed, then it was you," he says in his teasing, sensible tone.

"I'm not the one being distracting."

"Have you looked in the mirror lately?"

She stares at him for a moment and then a small smile curves her lips. "Geez, give a woman some warning next time you decide to pour your heart out."

"That wasn't pouring my heart out. If I pour my heart out, trust me, you'll be left in tears because my heart is filled with you, Emily."

When she raises her hands in front of her mouth, he knows that is a good sign for a woman, but then she starts to sob, in the most heart breaking way, and Dr. Spencer Reid sees his chances at happiness...and babies...and sharing lazy Sunday mornings barely dressed with Emily...all slipping away from him.

Moving close to her, he wraps her in his arms. "You think you can't have love but I think you can. Between the two of us who is right more often?"

She sniffles. By now her face is a mess, her eyes are red, her nose is running. Yet she's still beautiful to him and he can barely keep his eyes from her lips, barely stop himself from focusing on how good she feels in his arms.

"Its not that, you idiot-"

"Idiot. What idiot do you know with an 187 IQ?"

"You can still be an idiot and you are if you think these are anything but happy tears."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

Gently he cups her face and brushes his lips over hers, forgiving her that last little bit that he held back before...forgiving her for hurting his heart...thanking her for filling his heart...showing her that she was right to want him and their future would be happy, despite living so close to the ugly side of humanity each day.

They saw enough hate, death, pain and heartbreak at work.

At home they needed peace, serenity, love and as many dreams as possible coming true. They both have been alone way too long. As Reid kisses Emily he realizes that happiness is a choice and he is choosing happiness as he chooses her.

It is the easiest choice he ever made but it has been the hardest road to get there. And, he thinks, that makes this moment even sweeter because just a year ago he thought that the only way he could see Emily again was at a cemetery.

Now she's a step closer to being the mother of his child and that feels a lot more right than thinking Ian Doyle beat Dr. Spencer Reid. Not this time. Not ever.

Bullies are unhappy people who want to make others just as unhappy. Reid will never let a bully ruin his life, no matter how many come along and try. As long as Reid has Emily giving him her baffled looks that say "You amaze me so much," he knows he has everything he needs to be happy.

Everything he needs starts and ends with Emily.

THE END


	18. Bittersweet, 1

**Note- **_I started writing this a month ago. I wanted to make it longer but the muse didn't give me anymore. Now that the finale is here I'd like to post it before the show airs. So here goes..._

**Bittersweet**

**Reid and Prentiss**

**Chapter One**

**May 2012**

"What's bothering you?" he asked her, as they sat together at a table during the wedding. It was late into the evening and most of the guests had gone home already; the rest looked tired, buzzed and happy to be sharing in JJ and Will's celebration.

For Spencer Reid this day had been rather bittersweet. He was used to the feeling that way by now. He had enjoyed himself at the reception but he couldn't help noticing that Emily seemed very distracted. All through the evening he kept wondering what it was that she wasn't saying.

It was a notoriously bad sign for Emily Prentiss to be keeping secrets.

Everyone who knew her knew that she didn't open up very easily about what she was feeling so it came as no surprise to Reid when she gave him a wide eyed look, feigning confusion at his question.

Reaching over, he gently lifted her hand, his thumb brushing over her brittle, gnawed down fingernails.

She let out a sigh of resignation and said "I didn't want to ruin everyone's good time tonight by being a buzz kill with my announcement."

"Announcement?" His stomach dropped and the hairs on the back of his neck stood up, as if his body already knew he wasn't going to like what she was about to tell him.

"I'm leaving the team."

He blinked and then blinked again. His throat got tight. "They're forcing you out just like they did JJ?"

"No, no, nothing like that. It's my choice. I'm taking an oversees post. It's just temporary. I'll be back. I'm just not sure when."

The room swam around him. The noise of the guests and music suddenly seemed miles away. He leaned closer to Emily to make sure he was hearing her right, even though he knew he had. Panic, disbelief and helplessness all churned together inside his gut.

Everything was changing for the worse and there was nothing he could do to stop it. Once Emily made her mind up there was no convincing her otherwise, as he knew from painful past experience.

After a few moments of taking in Emily's answer, Reid asked her "When do you leave?"

Her eyes locked on his, she hesitated briefly before answering "Tommorow. It should have been today but it was a little late to tell JJ she had to find another bridesmaid because I have an international arms dealer to chase down...Do me a favor and forget I said that last part because my assignment is confidential."

"I won't tell anyone."

"I know."

Looking toward the bar, Reid noticed Hotch and Rossi having a drink together. "Does Hotch know?"

"Yeah." Emily glanced over to where JJ was dancing with Will. "I don't know how to tell JJ. She deserves to not have anything mess up this day for her. It took her so long to get here, you know?"

"You're just going to leave without saying goodbye?"

"I'll be back."

"What if you aren't?"

"I will be, I promise."

"You can't promise that, though."

"Reid, please...don't make this any harder on me."

"I'm sorry. I haven't fully wrapped my mind around this...It's hard to take it in. I finally got used to you being back and the headaches have eased up and it felt right again, on the team. It felt so incredibly-"

"Right," she whispered, looking down at her chewed up fingernails again. "I know but this is just something I have to do. A favor for an old friend. I got most of my former team killed-"

"No. That was Doyle, not you."

"It was my bad choices and we both know it. Clyde Easter is still around and he needs my help. I couldn't turn him down. What would you do if it was ten years from now and I came to you, after not seeing you for a long time, and asked you for help on a case that meant everything to me? Would you turn me away?"

"I can't hypothesis that scenario because there are not enough known variables. For example, why haven't I seen you in the long time?"

She smiled slightly. "Reid, you know what I mean."

"I know but I don't want to know because it means you're leaving and I can't stop you."

"It will be okay." She downed the rest of her drink. "I'll be back before you can hardly miss me."

"I'm starting to miss you already."

Her eyes turned tender for a long moment before she stood up, grabbing her clutch purse off the table. "I need to get up to my room. If I don't get some sleep, I'm going to be a walking zombie tommorow and that is no way to get through a twelve hour flight. It will be just my luck that the plane will be filled with screaming babies."

Reid stood up. "So I guess this is goodbye?"

They stared into each other's eyes for a moment. "How about so long for now?"

"Promise that you'll come back?"

She looked at where Morgan and Garcia had now joined Rossi and Hotch at the bar. "I have to. This is where my family is."

Emily reached out and gave Reid a hug. After she pulled away, she asked "Walk me to my room?"

The wedding was held at a resort on the coast. The ceremony was on the beach and the reception was in the hotel ballroom. Since the resort was located more than a hour from Quantico many of the wedding guests had booked rooms for the night.

Reid and Emily stopped by the bar area to say good night to Hotch, Rossi, Morgan and Garcia. Emily hugged Garcia so tightly that Garcia joked "You haven't went and got a little crush on me, have you, sugar?"

Emily chuckled. "I guess weddings just bring out my softer side."

"Good to know you actually have one," Morgan joked. "I'm sure the unsubs you've taken down would never believe it."

Emily cast one last look at JJ, who was still dancing with Will, and said "I better get going. I'm beat."

"Tell me about it," Rossi said. "Working a case all week and then this long day. I'm gonna need a vacation myself to relax."

Hotch gave him a stern look. "I thought that is what all your book tours are for?"

"Hey, I'm working then!"

"Yeah," Garcia joked "it's hard work to sit there being adored by your legion of panting fans."

Emily smiled at their banter. Soon she was saying goodnight and heading for her room, with Reid next to her. When they stepped off the elevator on her floor, she said "I didn't mean for it to happen like this. Me not getting the chance to say goodbye to everyone, to give them the head's up that I'm leaving. This just came up suddenly. I'll call each of them to explain."

"Are you sure you have to do this?"

"Take this assignment? Yeah. I know the timing is lousy..."

"Why didn't you say anything earlier, when I asked you to the concert?"

"Because I wanted to say yes to you," she admitted to him.

When he first saw Emily in the dress that JJ had picked for the bridesmaid, her hair pulled up delicately with flowers strewn through out it, there was just something so lovely about her, something that made him remember those random moments from the past when he felt so close to her. He couldn't help but tell her that she looked breathtaking.

Standing in the hallway of the hotel, making small talk while they waited for the ceremony to start, Reid had asked Emily if she would accompany him to a classical music concert in the park in a few weeks. They had hung out plenty of times before as friends but this time, it seemed to be understood by both of them, he wasn't asking as just as friend.

He told her "But you knew you couldn't keep that date with me."

"The words just came out before I could stop myself and then Morgan walked up and it was too late to say anything more." Emily reached into her purse and took out the key for the door. "I know I won't be back by the end of the month but maybe whenever I do get back there will be some other concert. I get it if things change by then, though, for you. Believe me, I know how it usually goes with stuff like this."

"How does it usually go?"

"For me? Lousy." She got the door to her room opened and didn't turn back to face him. Her shoulders slouched as she seemed to resign herself to the fact that they would never make it on that date.

He hadn't been sure earlier if she really would consider it a romantic date but now he thought he was clearly seeing it written all over her body language- when she finally completely let down her gaurd for the first time since he had known her- that yes she had wanted that with him. Maybe it had only been for that brief moment in the hall when things seemed to all come together for them- when she took his breath away in her dress- or maybe it had been building like a slow cresting wave for months and years, but either way Reid believed Emily did see the potential in them, as he did too now.

Yet she wasn't the type to hope that this feeling they were sharing for this moment in time would outlast her assignment oversees; that the stars would align ever again as they had tonight; that their dangerous jobs wouldn't kill them before they could meet again; that neither would find another lover in the time they were apart.

And maybe she was right. That was how life always seemed to work. Things happened and roads diverged. Circumstances changed feelings and plans. Maybe there would be no date for them somewhere down the road.

But there was right now.

And for once Reid wanted to seize this moment. His belief that Emily truly did long to go on a date with him and his anger at himself for only asking her out today, instead of long ago, pushed him to not let this moment slide by without acting on the feelings brewing between them.

He reached out and placed his fingers gently beneath her chin, feeling her slightly shiver under his touch as he turned her face toward him, leaned down and pressed a chaste kiss to her lips.

A part of him had wondered if it would be strange to kiss a woman who had been his friend for so long but in the moment there was nothing awkward about it. It was tender and sweetly seductive, as she softly caressed his face and chest, her eyes staying closed for a moment even after he broke away.

A fierce protective tone he had never heard before come out of his mouth was there when he whispered "You_ have to _come home to me, Emily."

Her dark eyes held his as she titled her head and gave him a look filled with wonder.

Reid took a large step back. "So long for now, okay?"

She took him by the hand and tugged him forward. "Stay...please." Lifting her head, while raising up on her tip toes, her mouth met his. She walked backwards into the room, whispering against his lips again, "Stay."


	19. Bittersweet, 2

**Bittersweet**

**Reid and Prentiss**

**Chapter Two**

**May 2012**

He hadn't planned on spending the night with her when Reid had walked Emily up to her hotel room. His brain didn't really work that way- thinking he would make love to a woman he hadn't ever even kissed before.

But their first kiss had led to another and another and another. A single kiss had simply not been enough to quench the desire sparking between them. The feel of her soft lips against his did things to his body and mind: left him shaking and sweaty, weak and needy.

He hadn't known a kiss could hit him on such a deep level until he had leaned over to give her a tender kiss goodbye.

That goodbye kiss hadn't been planned by him either when they had left the wedding reception together. Though Reid had known, as they had made their way toward her room, that Emily would be leaving in the morning to work in Europe for an undetermined amount of time and this may be his last chance to kiss her for months.

Still he had only asked her out for a first date earlier that day, after years of being strictly good friends, and Reid wouldn't want to act presumptuous or appear overly eager. He was still getting used to the fact that they both could admit they'd like to spend an evening together that could be deemed romantic in nature.

That fact was surprising enough to set him back on his heels. Things like that didn't happen to men like Reid. He didn't get to date a woman so gorgeous, so brilliant, who knew him inside and out: a dream woman.

The last time that had happened Gideon had prodded JJ into giving Reid a pity date to a football game. Sure, there had been other women in his life and some had even made it into his bed since that date years before but none of them came close to being the kind of friend to him that Emily already was, and the kind of woman who could understand his job, his history, his personality and feelings like Emily could.

No woman Reid had every dated fit him as well as Emily already did.

And the thought that he had asked her out on a whim and she smiled a sweet smile and replied _"Really? Just us? You don't know how much I'd honestly love that," _and he knew, like she knew, that they weren't talking about a just friends outing this time around, made him excited about his future in a way he couldn't remember ever being before.

He wasn't usually all that optimistic about his future. Now anything seemed possible.

She changed everything for him. Just as last night had changed everything between them. Now her nude body was pressed against his side as she slept in the early dawn hours, while Reid lay there just listening to her breathe, knowing that it wouldn't be long until they were kissing goodbye for real.

XXXXXXXXX

She woke up to the feel of Reid rhythmically caressing her scalp, his fingers buried into the nape of her hair. Lightly moaning at the pleasurable sensation, she stretched to work out some kinks. As she did so she rubbed her naked body against his. Her leg was tucked over his leg and her arm wrapped around his body.

Emily hadn't slept curled up to a man in decades. She was the type who kept to her side of the bed after sex. But with Reid it had all been different.

Every moment was precious because they probably wouldn't get anymore together for a good, long while.

Soon she would be on a plane heading to Europe to work a case with Clyde. Two days ago that had seemed like the thing she needed to do to pay back a debt to him but now it was something that was quietly tearing her heart apart, because she had just discovered this lovely shift in her relationship with Reid. It felt so natural and perfectly right that she hated to leave and wonder if it would be here waiting for her when she returned.

Blinking her still sleepy eyes, she focused on his face for the first time that morning. Seeing slight traces of sadness etched there, her heart squeezed painfully in her chest. Stroking his stubbly cheek, she whispered "I will come back. I swear it," before pressing a kiss to his jaw.

He took her into his arms, rolling slightly toward her so that their bodies were more meshed together. She delighted in the feeling of his lithe, tight, lightly muscled frame against her softer yet still toned body.

Dropping his forehead onto her shoulder, he deeply breathed in her scent before whispering her name "Emily."

She stroked his back and kissed along his shoulder until he moved his lips to connect with hers. Pushing her onto her back, he rose over her and their eyes held for a long moment. When their lips met again they started to make love, knowing it would be the last time for a long time.

XXXXXXXXX

"Please don't offer to take me to the airport, okay?" Emily asked Reid, as she brushed her hair.

"Okay," he answered, in a tone that told her that he hated the fact she was still taking this assignment after everything they had shared in the last twenty four hours.

"It's just another case. Something I gotta do. Let's not make it a big deal or problem between us, all right?"

"It doesn't matter what I say, Emily-"

"That's not true."

"You're going. All I can do is deal with it."

She set down the brush and turned away from the mirror to face him. "You're right. I'm going no matter what. But I'd rather go knowing I have your full support."

"You do. I just hate that no one I trust is going to be there to have your back."

"I trust Clyde."

"I suppose I have to let that be enough for me then. I'll have to trust your instincts."

"Like you do whenever we're in the field together."

"But this time I won't be there. I would feel better about this if I was."

She smiled slightly. "Well if you were going with me then we wouldn't have just had awesome goodbye sex so really think about that line of logic all the way through before you commit to it."

He smirked back but the smile didn't reach his eyes. She knew how hard goodbyes were for him. She only hoped that he knew how hard this was on her also.

The morning was flying by way too fast. If she didn't leave in the next twenty minutes she might not make it through airport security in time to catch her flight.

They had both had showers already and eaten a breakfast from room service, lazily chatting about news in the paper that Reid had bought downstairs when he went looking for coffee, not able to wait the twenty minutes that room service would take to bring some.

It was a lovely morning, the type that Emily rarely ever had enjoyed with a man. She usually would leave a guy's bed and not stick around for breakfast or tell him he had to go from her bed because she had a busy day ahead of herself. She didn't want the guy sticking around and thinking they were a serious couple when she had no time in her life for something like that.

Her career had been her life for so long. When she finally started to realize it might be a problem that she hadn't stumbled along the guy who she wanted to stick around, that jumping from dangerous job to even more dangerous jobs every few years didn't lend itself well to long term love affairs, she was already forty.

Forty might be the new thirty but still a part of her had figured it was too late to fall in love again- especially considering her work schedule and horrible luck with men. If she couldn't figure it out in twenty five years of dating, when would she ever?

Yet this was happening now, with one of her best friends, and nothing about it felt awkward, forced or wrong in any way. It all seemed as close to heaven as she had ever been.

Walking over to where Reid was sitting in a chair, Emily said "When I get home we'll go to the opera and then afterwards we'll have _dessert_."

The way she said dessert made it clear she wanted more steamy, sensual, mind blowing sex with this boy genius. Sitting down in his lap, she wrapped one arm around his neck and blew on his ear.

"Sound good?" she asked.

His face got slightly red and he seemed speechless as she watched his mind work, imagining her homecoming, and then he turned and looked into her eyes and said "Anything with you sounds good to me."

And that is why she loved him.


	20. Bittersweet, 3

**Reid and Prentiss**

**Chapter Three**

**October 2012**

Reid waited on bated breath for phone calls from Europe from Emily, while she was off working with Clyde Easter to track down an international terrorist. The calls usually came late at night, his time, because she never knew when he might be working a case. She didn't want to interrupt his job so she tried to catch him around midnight. It made it hard for him to fall asleep before then, just in case she might call, and if he did then he found himself waking up during the night to check the time and his phone to see if there were any message from her.

She didn't call nearly enough for him. He wanted to hear from her everyday to know she was okay but he was lucky if he heard from her once every couple of weeks. Reid knew that wasn't because Emily didn't care about him enough to call more often. It was because her job had her in situation where there wasn't very good cell coverage or much time to be making calls.

He wanted her back in the BAU where he could see with his own eyes each day what kind of danger she was in and that at the end of each day she was safe. But what he wanted wasn't going to happen until she caught the terrorist that she had set her sights on.

Often he thought of the night they had shared together right before she left for this assignment- the feel of her slick, smooth, soft body gliding and grinding against his- and it left him aching for her even more. Not just so they could have sex, though, so that he could be near this woman who knew all of him and wanted him that much.

He had no desire to look twice at another woman now. Not when he knew what it was like to be with Emily.

When his cell phone rang at 2:33 pm with her name on the screen, Reid's heart jumped into his throat. He figured that it would either be really good news- she caught the suspect and was on her way back home- or bad news, and he didn't even want to imagine what the bad news could be.

Quickly he snatched his phone off the table at the police station and answered. "Emily?"

"No, it's Clyde..." a heavy sigh.

Goosebumps spread over Reid as his eyes slowly closed. "Is she...?"

"Hurt, yes. She's in hospital here in Prague. They're waiting to do surgery on her back once the swelling goes down."

"Was she shot?"

"Fell out a window a couple of flights up. I'm sorry. I promised her I'd look after her. Of course she told me she would be the one looking after me." There was a pause before he continued in a strained tone "I failed her terribly. She's on painkillers but being stubborn and didn't want me to call anyone till we knew more. But I thought it would be prudent to inform you sooner rather than later. Her injuries are not life threatening but the doctors don't know, or won't say, the severity yet."

"Tell me the address where you are," Reid barked into the phone, his hand shaking as he scratched down the information.

Just then JJ walked into the room and said "We're ready to give the profile." Seeing the tense look on his face, she asked "Spence? Everything all right?"

Reid told Clyde "You make sure she knows I'm on my way," before he hung up. Looking up at JJ, he said "Emily's been injured and I need to go to her."

Then he hurried from the room to find Hotch and explain that even though they all loved Emily...Reid was in love with her and he wasn't going to allow her to go through this without him by her side.

XXXXXXXX

As he walked through the foreign hospital, the smells permeating the air started to get to him.

He remembered when his mother was first put in the mental health facility and how that place had smelled of antiseptic and misery. Usually being inside of hospitals did not make his skin crawl- he went into morgues and viewed it as a challenge to look at the body scientifically rather than emotionally- but it was entirely different when someone he loved was a patient.

He knew some Czech and most of the staff seemed to also speak English so Reid was able to communicate who he was there to see and get the directions to Emily's room. When he reached her room he found she was alone, asleep in the bed.

Walking near her, seeing her for the first time since they had hugged and kissed goodbye outside of the resort, he noticed she looked pale and had probably suffered great blood loss from smashing through the window. Her hands, arms, and throat bore abrasions and those were just the parts he could see of her. Underneath her hospital gown were surely more cuts and bruises, marring her beautiful ivory skin.

When they had made love he had noticed the skin graft over her heart. From the case file on when she took on Doyle, Reid knew that Emily had been branded by that man. But it was nothing they had every spoke about. Now she bore more scars from battle, just like everyone on their team did. She was as tough as any of them. As willing as any of them to risk the danger.

Only Reid hated it now that she had been in that sort of danger, especially without him near to look out for her.

Gently he took her hand; the action jostled her awake. Her eyes slowly focused on him and then she squeezed his hand.

"Reid..."

Tears sprang to his eyes. He dropped his head down and pressed a kiss to the top of her hand.

She whispered, groggily, "I really screwed up this time."

"No! You did your job. It's going to be okay."

She started to cry, the sound ragged and heartbreaking, growing louder and louder even though it was clear she was trying to hold it in.

"Emily, shhhhh. You must stay still," he warned her, wiping away her tears. "You would really be crying if I had brought your mother with me."

His little joke made her slightly chuckle, swallowing down her sobs.

He leaned over to nuzzle her neck. "I know you probably don't want me to be here seeing you like this but I'm very grateful Clyde called me. And I'm grateful we're more than friends now. If we were simply friends I would have to accept your stubborn statements, that I know are coming, about how you can handle this all on your own but since we are a step beyond friends I do not and will not take that for an answer."

Their eyes met and held. He could see fear and regrets swimming in hers but he knew it wasn't about them. They could never be a mistake and he would make sure she knew that, especially if she never walked again.

Because Emily would think of herself as a burden on him. Reid could never imagine seeing her that way. She was still the woman who made him feel like a complete man finally- like he was sexy, funny, worth being with and lovable. Like he could love her the way she wanted and needed.

She had made his life worthwhile by opening her heart to him. He would never allow her to push him away because of a medical condition. They were in this together, and Emily would just have to accept that it was no burden on him because he loved her.

There love was just getting started, still being tested at every turn, but Dr. Spencer Reid no longer doubted what his path should be. Now he knew. He saw his future every time he looked into her eyes.

XXXXXXXXX

**December 2012**

Tears welled in her eyes as he opened his Christmas present from her. "I promised myself I would not cry!" she snarked. "Damn female hormones."

"Why would you cry over a Christmas present?" he asked, unwrapping a huge box that held another box and another and another until he got down to a very small box. When he opened it he saw a set of wedding rings.

"That's why."

His eyes widened in surprise and she couldn't blame him. They had only been together seven months and she wasn't even walking again yet. She had moved back to Washington DC for physical therapy and was living in a handicap accessible apartment. Stubbornly Emily wanted to still be as independent as she could, even with her injury, so she refused to allow her mother to come stay with her and help her to recover.

The only person Emily let see her at her worse was Reid. She hated that their still new relationship was being put to this test but every moment that he was there for her through this ordeal she only fell in love with him more and more.

"I never would have guessed," he said, about the rings she had presented him, his tone awed. "No one has ever wanted me like this before." Looking into her eyes, he asked "Are you sure you want this...me?"

She reached over and stroked his cheek. "If you're sure you want this...me."

A slow smile grew on his lips and she had her answer. Nothing they had gone through was like the average dating relationship but it all brought them closer until there was not a doubt left between them that they made each other's lives better and made each other stronger.

Emily had come close to death several times in her life. With the days she had left she wanted to live this life to the fullest...with the love of her life, her Dr. Spencer Reid.

They shared a tender kiss as the lights of the Christmas tree blinked in the corner of the room. Last year they both had been without love during this holiday but next year and the year after and the year after that they would have each other.

Never again would they have to make it through this world alone. Never during their life together would another holiday have to be bittersweet and filled with lonlieness and wishes for more. Now they had all they needed in each other and it could only get stronger and better from here.

THE END


	21. Don't Know Much, Reid and Emily

**Note-** _This one shot is written for CCOAC Challenge 22. The assignment given to me specified a pairing and three things that had to be included in the story. It needed to be centered on Valentine's Day too._

**Don't Know Much**

**Reid and Emily**

**February 2012**

"In my world," Emily Prentiss said, as she sat on the jet surrounded by her teammates as they were flying home from a case, "Valentine's Day doesn't exist."

Hearing this, Reid arched an eyebrow in surprise. He knew she was not much a fan of the usual romantic conventions like marriage, moonlit walks, candy hearts, the standard dozen red roses, chick flicks and greeting cards with sophomoric poetry inside but he didn't realize that she had such hate for this holiday also.

JJ said "It's usually totally overrated."

"Oh, I don't know about that," Derek said. "I've had my share of pretty hot and fantastic V-days in my day. You just gotta find the right honey to share it with, get yourself some chocolate syrup, whip cream, maybe a pair of edible panties, some smooth jazz and do your thing."

Rossi smirked. "I've never needed accessories to enjoy myself but everyone is different."

The teammates laughed and Derek chuckled before saying "Try it, old guy. You might just like it."

"Well I'm spending tonight at home with my favorite man," Emily said. "My cat."

JJ said "Cats never break your heart. I should have gotten a cat."

"You're lucky with Will," Emily argued. "If I could find a man who would adore me like that...who wanted to give me a home and a baby...but there are only a few Wills in the world and a whole bunch of jerks who couldn't find a g-spot with a road map."

"Ouch!" Derek cried. "That's harsh."

Reid said, in his perfectly scientific way, "Some women are not able to easily reach climax but usually the problem lies with a man's unwillingness to be patient and attentive. When a man puts his partners needs above his own the large majority of women can climax on most occasions. Sadly too many guys still think the g-spot is nothing but a myth when actually it is a group of nerves located-"

"Spence! We get it!" JJ cried.

He bit back the rest of what he was going to say. He knew he rambled at times and got lost in the facts too often. It made most people find him hard to relate to and he felt the same about most people he met- especially women. That is why he hadn't ever been in a serious and long term relationship in all his thirty years.

Though, contrary to popular belief, he had dated and slept with a handful of women. There was even one woman who he had hooked up with for most of the Spring and Summer after he got addicted to drugs. It was during a time when his defenses were low and she just wanted someone to make her feel good. That was something he could do. Something he needed at the time. But it had never been a love affair.

He had plenty of crushes in his lifetime, too, starting back when he was eleven and in high school but he had never been in proper, real, soul stirring, life changing love...until now...maybe. Though he knew so much about so many topics that some people might even say Dr. Spencer Reid was an expert on everything, he was no expert on romantic entanglements so he couldn't say for certain if what he felt now was love or another useless crush.

Could a person be in love when the other person didn't even know about it? Was unrequited love really anything at all or just a foolish fantasy, a balm for an aching soul? He wasn't sure but he knew what he was feeling and he knew that, after all this time, it was not going away.

Still he was probably going about this all wrong with what he planned to do. The odds were this would blow up in his face.

XXXXXXXX

They sometimes rode the train home together and tonight, lucky for him, was one of those nights when they did. The weather was unseasonably warm for this time of year and had been for months now so they weren't shivering or traipsing through snow as they walked the couple of blocks to the station.

Once they were on their way Reid asked "Do you really hate Valentine's Day as much as you said earlier?"

"What is there to like about it?"

"I don't know. I've never celebrated it personally but some people seem to think it is a very romantic day out of the year and, as I understand it, some women are quite disappointed if they don't receive a token of affection on that day." His voice was speeding up as he reached into his messenger bag and fumbled with the wrapped present before pulling it out. "With that in mind, I...um...got you this."

She startled. "Reid, you...that's sweet but you...I can't believe you got me a Valentine's Day present."

"Every woman should have one and it would be a sin if a woman like you, Emily, went without, even if the only gift you get is from a man like me."

"Trust me," she said, as she took the gift, "I know how rare it is to know a man like you...You're blowing my mind here, Reid. Am I...I'm probably reading too much into this, right?"

He didn't answer and she opened the present to find a delicate ankle bracelet.

He said "I notice you wear those sometimes. I hope it is okay."

A tender smile curved her lips. "It's beautiful. Thank you..." She chuckled. "You must really feel sorry for me that I'm all alone again another year."

"Not at all. I hope you know it is not a pity present."

"Then what is it?"

He took it out, crouched by her feet and asked "May I?" as people watched them.

She nodded and he slipped the bracelet on. His hand gently stroked her ankle for a moment before his eyes met hers again. "It's just a token of affection, that's all, Emily."

She got a little bit teary as she said "Everything has sucked so much lately and then you go and do this...and now I can't hate this holiday...You sure know how to mess up a girl's bad mood."

"You're welcome."

He sat next to her again and they finished the ride home, a slight change in the air between them. He wasn't sure she would return his feelings but his heart was full anyway because he had made the woman he loved happy.

And wasn't that what this day was all about? Reid might not know much about love but he knew this much...and it was just enough for Emily for today. When she reached out and took his hand, as they left the train, he fell in love with Valentine's Day and a little deeper in love with her...as hope took hold of them both.

_(Look at this face,_

_I know the years are showing._

_Look at this life,_

_I still don't know where it's going._

_I don't know much_

_but I know I love you_

_and that may be all I need to know_.) (Ronstadt and Neville)

THE END


End file.
